After seeing the post about quitting weed it made me want to share my story.
Like the title says I wasted a decade on drugs.
ADDICTION: Drugs brought me to places that no sane person would go. I'd say drugs took much of my life from me, but I willingly gave it away. Drugs started as a fun thing to do with friends on the weekends, a reprive from college and work. To sleeping in abandoned buildings, living on the street with a hooker girlfriend, jails, institutions, and death.
I've been in more rehab facilities than most people go to the mall. I've been in jail like it was my hotel room. Checking in to my cell, seeing the same faces. When you can't afford your DOC (Drug Of Choice) and NEED it or else you won't be able to function or will be violently sick, you will go to extreme lengths to get it. Drain your bank account, steal from family and friends, then when you have burned all your bridges you will steal from anyone. Then you get kicked out of your house, or you can't afford rent anymore and get kicked on the streets.
By this point, you have lost your job, burned through any money you could get and pawned all your possessions. Now with only the clothes on your back, because your addiction to these drugs, is more important than life itself. I've committed crimes (mostly fraud, never a violent crime) to support my habit. That's what leads to jails eventually. It took the DEA 2 years to catch up to me, but they did. I caught 14 felonies in one arrest. What an accomplishment. Picked up a homeless Hocker GF who was also squatting in an abandoned house I found myself in. I've been stabbed by a rican because a drug deal between me and a kid who I guess owed him money.
I used to live, and lived to use.
I know I am rambling, there's just too much to write. That's why I am currently writing a book.
The working title is called "Learn from my Mistakes" where the story will be flushed out and coherent.
RECOVERY: After being clean for 7 months I feel so much better not having to use drugs to cope with everyday life. I found my dad dead, and tried to revive him, thats when I went on my last horrible run. Now I can cope with things like this. To have people actually want to be around me. To DO, what I say I'm going to DO, and not lie and manipulate to get things. So much has changed. I want to encourage anyone struggling with addiction to get help. If you have tried your own way to stop and it hasn't worked, or you keep relapsing to your DOC (drug of choice) the easiest & cheapest way to get some help is to go to an AA or NA meeting. The people there are just like you, it doesn't matter what your DOC was, be it alcohol, weed, heroin, coke, meth even gambling or sex. The advice & skills I have gotten there are more than skills to stop using my DOC but they are LIFE skills to improve your life. They help you to see the reason WHY you use that DOC. That is just as important as not using your DOC, If not more.
Now I am going to school to be an addiction rehab counselor, I want to give back.
If anyone wants to talk, vent, w/e feel free to PM me.
I've been around and can relate. And if I can't relate to your scenerio I CAN relate to how you feel.
Drugs are a dream killer, they ruin lives and take names. Just like how "normal" people can have a few drinks then stop, The addict can't. once we start the fun don't stop! That's what separates the alcoholics and addict from normal people. Also that we use our DOC (drug of choice) to numb ourselves and use them as a crutch to either face problems or run from problems. If you can do your DOC and it doesn't affect your life then good you aren't an addict, or you don't realize what you DOC is really doing to your life ;)
It's great that you acknowledged your issue, The wounds that never heal are the ones we refuse to see. You can't fix what you don't know is broken.