Little background....I'm 36, married, 3 kids, dog, etc. I've spent the last 13 years as a residential real estate appraiser. Due to my lack of a college education, I've been limited on how far I can go with licensure/certification for this field. Due to this factor, I've basically been shut down as most banks require a certification which is a step above basic licensure.
I was a heavy pot smoker for about 15 years and I'm a few months into no dope. I feel like I'm just floating along with no real purpose. I'm now a stay at home dad and do all the house shit you'd expect a stay at home parent to do...laundry, cooking, cleaning, getting kids to/from school, grocery shopping...the whole bit. My wife has her own business and we can manage just fine on her salary.
I'm having a hard time trying to figure out what I'm going to next with my life. I know I don't want to be a stay at home dad forever. I've applied for 30+ jobs over the last 12 months but no one wants to hire some one who's been self employed for 13+ years. What did I do wrong?
My question to you Voaters is when you've been in a transitional period in your life, what did you do to figure out the next step? I feel lost and am just looking for some random Internet wisdom. Thanks for your time!
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[–] ABACABB ago
Keep your head up. The first few months after pot are going to play some tricks on you. Did the crazy dreams go away yet? Your brain is just readjusting to different stimulus. I found exercise is a good way to curb that bored/sad feeling in the months after quitting.
As for a job you said the family is fine on your wife's salary. That's a great thing to have so cherish it. This allows you to find something you actually like to do. Then you need to find out how to make money off of it. Or just be happy being a dad.
Shit I'm jealous as fuck that you get to stay home with kids and the house. And that leads me to answer your question. When I'm in transitional periods trying to figure out the next step I take a different perspective. Not just one different perspective but many. Often time this will lead me realizing where I'm at is just fine or push me towards something new. Take your parents perspective--wife's, kids, buddies' perspective. It may lead you to a new exciting place or make you appreciate the wonderful life you've built.
Now go drink a beer and mow the lawn!
[–] JeepGuy79 [S] ago
I've got fake grass in the yard...there's no real grass in the desert man! The dreams have gotten better...but still really vivid and crazy sometimes. I will start looking at things from a different angle. Thanks for the kind words and good advice!
[–] ABACABB ago
What kind do you have? I've been thinking of getting the fake stuff but worried about it getting too hot to walk on bare foot in the summer. Is that the case with it?