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[–] Samchay6 0 points 19 points (+19|-0) ago  (edited ago)

Democratic presidential nominee Hillary Clinton didn’t know that a standalone capital “C” in her emails was used to mark classified information, recently released FBI documents reveal. Instead, she apparently speculated the “C” was just used for alphabetizing documents.

So...

  • Mrs. Clinton didn't know how classified documents work.

  • Mrs Clinton can't remember any security briefing that talked about the proper handling of e-mails.

  • Mrs. Clinton cannot recal several years of important events due to several traumatic brain injuries.

And we're going to give Mrs. Clinton the nuclear codes?

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[–] epsilona01 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

Were any other documents marked in that way? Like, ones with a (M) for money or (B) for bribes? I haven't seen anything else like that. No one in their right mind would think that unless there was some uniformity to markings on all emails.

Oh, and nuclear codes? She loses all sorts of information and laptops and USB sticks etc., she'd lose those too.

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[–] Gorillion 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

She doesn't need nukes. If some country started shit with her they'd all suddenly commit suicide over night.

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[–] 0x4F 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

Putin and Xi must be laughing their asses off. It is so fucking easy to troll Hillary with bad tech advice that they could literally just run a phony tech support hotline and have her give them the nuclear codes personally. Putin could get some teenager on VK to do it, he wouldn't even have to rely on his top cyberhacking team at the KGB, and then the phone call would go viral and everyone would think the U.S. is a complete joke because the president doesn't internet.

OK, Boris from State Farm. You want me to delete my cookies? Like what, by throwing up or something?

Yes, all of the cookies in the folder named System32. Also, you have a very serious malware program called NTOSKRNL.exe, go in and delete that one too. Then turn the computer off and on again.

OK, now the computer won't turn on? It says "Missing operating system"?

Ah, OK. What has happened here is your login has been compromised, and I will need to, uh... reset the flux capacitor hardcoded in the BIOS, by sending it back to the future. This is very important for national security. To do this, I will need the password to access the nuclear arsenal.

What? I can't give you that!

Um, uh, yeah -- uh... If you don't, I cannot deinstallate the NTOSKRNL virus, and it will send all of your files in the Pictures folder to a hacker named 4-Chan. He is, um... an alt-right nationalist from Wikileaks who works for Donald Trump. (laughter in background)

Pictures! No! I have vacation photos of me and Huma -- uh, wait, no, please disregard that. SIGH. All right. The password you're looking for is: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5...

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[–] Codewow [S] 2 points -1 points (+1|-2) ago 

Presidents don't have access to even initiate a launch sequence. Just saying.

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[–] gosso920 1 points 4 points (+5|-1) ago 

Besides, it's the Vice President's job to point out who has the codes.

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[–] Samchay6 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

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[–] Mut 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

Is it the guy with a suitcase cuffed to himself that follows Obama everywhere?

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[–] pyres 0 points 12 points (+12|-0) ago 

I'm guessing she was triggered, thinking it stood for Cunt.

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[–] not_shadowbanned_yet 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

she just thought that meant it was hers.

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[–] guinness2 0 points 8 points (+8|-0) ago  (edited ago)

What about the word "confidential"... does she not know what that means either?

I only ask because I've never seen a classified document or email without clear and full classification information both in the header and in the body.

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[–] Judge__Dredd 0 points 7 points (+7|-0) ago 

Illiterate, but still a presidential candidate, somehow?

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[–] something_went_wrong 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

I only ask because I've never seen a classified document or email without clear and full classification information both in the header and in the body.

Hillary specifically ordered that those classification headers be removed in emails crossing her personal server.

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[–] epsilona01 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

More than that, are we to believe that she had no expectation that she'd deal with classified information? That's like the architect of the screen-door-in-a-submarine saying he didn't expect that the sub would be going underwater.

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[–] guinness2 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

I suspect professional liars and career criminals like the Clintons know exactly how ridiculous their lies are... but they are often forced to carefully choose their best option from a set of only bad options, rather than admitting their crimes. It's no different that the time Bill argued about the definition of the word "is".

It reminds me of debating with a troll: if they have essentially lost the argument then they will start trying to redefine the meanings of words.

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[–] gosso920 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago  (edited ago)

"Hurr durr, it wasn't labeled 'Classified'." - Hillary CLInton

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[–] 8Hz_WAN_IP 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

"The most qualified candidate ever to run for president"

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[–] Codewow [S] 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

Yeah.. I'm pretty sure at this point I am more qualified!

[–] [deleted] 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

[Deleted]

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[–] SomewhatNeutral 1 points 0 points (+1|-1) ago 

she didn't have intent /s

f) Whoever, being entrusted with or having lawful possession or control of any document, writing, code book, signal book, sketch, photograph, photographic negative, blueprint, plan, map, model, instrument, appliance, note, or information, relating to the national defense, (1) through gross negligence permits the same to be removed from its proper place of custody or delivered to anyone in violation of his trust, or to be lost, stolen, abstracted, or destroyed, or

(2) having knowledge that the same has been illegally removed from its proper place of custody or delivered to anyone in violation of its trust, or lost, or stolen, abstracted, or destroyed, and fails to make prompt report of such loss, theft, abstraction, or destruction to his superior officer—

Shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than ten years, or both.

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[–] something_went_wrong 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

she didn't have intent /s

Thanks, Comey. Case closed then. Pack it up, boys. Let's go home.

[–] [deleted] 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

[Deleted]

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[–] jaceame 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

She is still subscribed to cat facts.

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[–] thehumungus 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

Hey Hillary - do you know what the letters F U mean?

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[–] something_went_wrong 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

"What in the heck does 'classified' mean anyway?" The old "what is the definition of 'is'" Clinton defense being used once again.

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