Hey FPH. First time poster, long time lurker.
I'm going to get right to the point. There is a fat piece of shit that is in my history class that is absolutely disgusting to the point that I almost vomited this morning.
His first offense was coming into class with a breakfast burrito that looked about the size of a small baby. He opened it up, and I swear he inhaled it through his nose. All I heard was snorting and oinking while he shoved it into his face hole and when he was done, he burped loudly. Luckily, it was before people (aside from me) were in class, so they were spared from his grossness.
However today, he was much worse. He (again) brought in the infant sized burrito, stuffed his face loudly, and burped loudly. Over, and over, and over, and over again. What made it worse was that I could smell it from my seat. It smelled like the kind of shits you get after a long night of drinking and eating greasy food. Then, he did it. He started farting. I had to finally get up and leave to keep my coffee from making a second appearance. Luckily, someone else came into the class and he knocked it off.
I'm not going to claim to be a perfect princess. I can hold my own when it comes to burping and farting. But what the FUCK makes these fat motherfuckers think they can just throw out all manners?! Is there just a point where they go "fuck it" and act like the pigs they resemble?
Thanks for letting me rant. I feel a lot better now.
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[–] VegetarianZombie1 0 points 10 points 10 points (+10|-0) ago
Next time, you should go to class wearing your hottest (yet appropriate) workout gear and sit in front of him. When he brings the burrito out, give him the most disgusted look, then go back to taking notes or whatever. As soon as the belching starts, get up, give him your most disgusted look, and go to the other side of the room.
If it tries to flirt with you, tell it, "sorry, but you eat and behave worse than an animal and I'm not into bestiality."
[–] SonicTurtle [S] 0 points 11 points 11 points (+11|-0) ago
I think I might. I just bought a new pair of running pants I've been needing to break in. Sounds like I have a perfect opportunity.
[–] VegetarianZombie1 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
Hehe. Have you seen him checking you out?
[–] caesah 0 points 3 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago
It's a university. Call a pig a pig at one's own risk, don't be surprised if it's reported to (and taken seriously by) the prof, security, or admin.
[–] VegetarianZombie1 0 points 6 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago
Then you can pull the woman card and say it raped you with its presence.
If they want to make university a fucking safe space, use it to your advantage.
[–] veganyogi 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
This is totally appropriate too if he's being disturbing. Just make sure he realizes what he's done. The disgusting look is one way to do it but I would probably use mean bitch stare in this case.