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[–] uberdoober 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

The treadmill I got onto happened to be in front of the TV I wanted to watch

I'll bet $50 that the TV was showing Food network.

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[–] Bunraku 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

Having food on a screen in front of her is the only way to make her waddle faster.