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[–] ForgotMyName 0 points 124 points (+124|-0) ago 

We need a TV show where your kid just goes around doling out the brutal truth to fatties.

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[–] inablackbox 0 points 72 points (+72|-0) ago 

Kids Say The Politically Incorrectest Things?

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[–] madam_psycho_sexy 0 points 12 points (+12|-0) ago 

I don't watch much tv, but I'd definitely watch that!

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[–] vdkmdd 0 points 11 points (+11|-0) ago 

Kids speak the truth!

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[–] ShitlordedByFacts 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago  (edited ago)

Kids Say The Factually Correctest Things, you mean?

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[–] isanonymoustaken 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

Kids Say The Politically Incorrectest But Still Correct Things (FTFY)

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[–] Trishit [S] 0 points 17 points (+17|-0) ago 

This isn't the first time, so maybe you're onto something.

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[–] INTERNET_TRASHCAN 0 points 7 points (+7|-0) ago  (edited ago)

Opening theme, probably classical music

Scene opens to a smiling 5 year old holding a proportionally gigantic microphone.

"Hi this is my show, and I walk around and talk about things I see!"

walks into Applebees

"Hi everyone, are you all fat because you eat too much? I'll be coming around to interview each of you, thanks!"

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[–] onegin 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

I wish "The Man Show" were still around. This is something they would do.

[–] [deleted] 2 points 34 points (+36|-2) ago 

[Deleted]

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[–] 32DDbitches 0 points 34 points (+34|-0) ago 

sexy ass skinny grandchildren

o_O

[–] [deleted] 1 points 14 points (+15|-1) ago 

[Deleted]

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[–] FattyHater 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

Lol

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[–] FatShamingShitLady 0 points 19 points (+19|-0) ago 

You do parenting right.

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[–] marquise 4 points 16 points (+20|-4) ago 

Good job. I normally despise children of all kinds and shapes, but this is definitely good parenting. Perhaps there is a good future for this world.

[–] [deleted] 5 points 20 points (+25|-5) ago 

[Deleted]

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[–] marquise 0 points 9 points (+9|-0) ago 

It must be brought up whenever possible. I am the King Kid Kicker (aka Other KKK). Bow before me!

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[–] 32DDbitches 0 points 8 points (+8|-0) ago 

Meh, not a fan myself, but I can and do tolerate them. Thing is, little kids friggin love me. I don't get it.

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[–] Damndirtyape 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

I don't mind kids. I mind the parents that still act like kids, who have kids.

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[–] trainedharpooner 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

In my experience, it's usually necessary, otherwise anyone with kids will conversely never shut the fuck up about what an amazing experience it is, and how you have to do it, and how "you'll understand when you have kids".

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[–] Trishit [S] 1 points 8 points (+9|-1) ago 

I love my kids, but am not a huge fan of everyone elses'. When I first told my mom I was expecting, she was like "but you don't do well with children, trishit"

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[–] FruityRumpusAsshole 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

Dem downvoats. Mombies detected.

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[–] marquise 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

IKR? Haters gonna procreate. Lol. This is FAT PEOPLE hate, bitches, not hate-everything-I-disagree-with-people.

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[–] Adi-opposed 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

I don't like most kids, but if I have my own I'm going to be sure to teach them how to be as non-pc as possible. Then if people try to start shit I'll just grin at them and say: "Kids these days, huh?"

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[–] marquise 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

Lol. Go for it. I randomly hiss at kids who misbehave. The shock and fear in their parents' eyes......

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[–] legendaryshitlord 0 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago 

In the same vain don't let hams prepare your food if you can avoid it.

I had a mayo soup sandwich (even after I scrapped most of it off) the other day because a ham though he was doing me a favor. Had some rice with my salt at a ham run buffet, they can't taste anything and assume everyone else is the same.

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[–] Trishit [S] 0 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago  (edited ago)

Yes. I love it when I have a few veggies with my butter and salt. I'm looking at you mother-in-law.

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[–] DeVera 1 points 6 points (+7|-1) ago  (edited ago)

:) heh, little shitlings say the most beautiful things.

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[–] Rusah 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago  (edited ago)

Reminds me of my sister when I was super young.

Was myself, 3 siblings and my mother at the dentist, we all had appointments in a row. I was 5 and my sister 9 in the waiting room with my mother and this blob waddles out of the back area to schedule her next appointment. I couldn't help but stare, wide-eyed, and as she leaves my sister blurts out "Mommy, she's FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT." According to my mother, she turned beet red and left quickly.

This story gets told occasionally at family get-togethers to much laughter.

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[–] journalistsarelazy 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

Equip him with a kiddy camera, he can pretend to be a spy, the OC would be awesome.

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