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[–] WhaleWails 0 points 62 points (+62|-0) ago 

I'd brought my carer with me

"Woa, what's a carer? One of those cool claws that helps you reach tall things?"

googles it

"...God damn it, I'm retarded."

[–] [deleted] 0 points 33 points (+33|-0) ago 

[Deleted]

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[–] Ser_Alliser_Thorne 0 points 9 points (+9|-0) ago 

At first I thought it a misspelling for career. Context sorted it out for me as well. It was like a "wth is this word?" moment.

OP : Fantastic story. Too bad that fatty wasn't thrown out of the store, though.

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[–] LittleRedPrincess 0 points 7 points (+7|-0) ago 

Dialect difference. US people tend to use a different term.

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[–] HamathaMcBeetusButt 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

I was even like "hey whoa a talking car that helps people shop" but then I used my big old brain, idk whats real anymore. Who am I? What is this place? WHO ARE YOU?

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[–] SkinnyMcShitlord [S] 0 points 16 points (+16|-0) ago 

Bahahaha!! Brilliant.

I do actually have one of those cool claw things to help me pick stuff up as well, if that helps? Hehe.

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[–] clamhurt_legbeard 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

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[–] WhaleWails 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

I love that gif. When I first saw that part in Quantum Leap I pissed myself laughing.

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[–] Ben77 0 points 40 points (+40|-0) ago 

I am so annoyed this fat arsehole did not get the living shit beaten out of him for attacking a disabled person.

I know a lot of people do not agree with violence, but I think in some cases, certain people could benefit from a damn good beating. I have seen the attitude of aggressive, entitled gobshites and wannabe hardmen vastly improve once they realise their unacceptable behavior has very real, very painful consequences.

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[–] SkinnyMcShitlord [S] 0 points 20 points (+20|-0) ago 

Trust me, if I wasn't so disabled myself then I'd have destroyed the fat fuck for attacking my friend!!

The security guard was definitely not gentle with him though once he started trying to shove my poor friend out of her scooter.

He grabbed the guy by the collar and pretty much throttled him while screaming in his face.

It all happened so fast and because my friend just drove off, I doubt it even got reported to the police (which looking back, it should have!)

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[–] Ben77 0 points 9 points (+9|-0) ago 

Glad he suffered some consequences at least.

How warped do you have to be to think it is OK to physically assault a disabled person over some perceived privilege?. Boogles the mind!

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[–] redditor1255 0 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago 

Is pepper spray legal where you live? This seems like an appropriate time to use it.

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[–] NoPenisForNeonHams 0 points 8 points (+8|-0) ago 

Self defense is justifiable violence and an unhinged fat fuck can be a god damn ham terrorist.

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[–] Ser_Alliser_Thorne 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

Wonder if I can claim that here in the states...

"It's coming right at us! It's a terrorist!!"

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[–] Ben77 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

I wonder if you can claim the god-awful stench as assault?

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[–] rshackleford252525 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

i agree with violence.. when it involves beating the shit out of a fat

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[–] Ben77 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

I believe there is a time and a place for it. Especially as a lot of fat guys are basically bullies who never grew out of the playground years, and think fat=strong.

[–] [deleted] 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

[Deleted]

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[–] Harry_Areola 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago  (edited ago)

In this case, you would have gotten a murder charge. If you need a gun to deal with fatties it's time to hit the gym.

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[–] notawhitesupremacist 0 points 20 points (+20|-0) ago 

sorry, it has a weight limit"

Classic burn.

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[–] CttCJim 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

agreed. beautiful ending.

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[–] 2841122? 0 points 17 points (+17|-0) ago 

Fat piece of shit is too "disabled" to walk through a store like a human, but is well enough to assault someone. Yeah, that checks out.

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[–] Medwin 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

A standing hamplanet has a lot of potential energy. You don't want to be in the way if it falls over.

[–] [deleted] 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

[Deleted]

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[–] ThisWeirdIndividual 0 points 13 points (+13|-0) ago 

Warms my heart to see that you can be deaf, on a power chair and be a perfectly functioning shitlord.

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[–] Max331 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

Shitlording is not ablest as long as your not a ham.

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[–] SkinnyMcShitlord [S] 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

Awww thanks! Shitlording knows no bounds though, hehe.

If you're not a whale, you can be a shitlord! We're equal opportunities at FPH :P

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[–] Dacoon63 0 points 13 points (+13|-0) ago 

You can almost hear the little pinwheel turning in fatties heads. I bet he was sitting on that chair getting red in the face due to how hard he was trying to focus on looking for that scooty puff. God they're pathetic.

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[–] SkinnyMcShitlord [S] 0 points 13 points (+13|-0) ago 

He really was pathetic and he was definitely red in the face after the little battle between him, my friend, my carer and the security guard.

Seriously though, it's not even a big store!! In the time he was sat waiting for the scooter to appear he could probably have waddled around the whole store 3 times, including stopping for breaks (and probably snacks by the look of him!)

My friend's reaction was just classic though. I was absolutely dying laughing by the time we got outside.

She was just so cold, condescending and indignant, it was amazing.

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[–] hypercat 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

For stores that size they should make the aisles only wide enough for a wheel chair, and then offer a wheelchair to any patron who needed them, but only standard sized wheel chairs.

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[–] pizzajesus 0 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago 

I wish you took a picture of the fatty, next time...

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[–] SkinnyMcShitlord [S] 0 points 11 points (+11|-0) ago 

Awww, you made me sad now. I honestly didn't think of it as I was in shock at the whole situation.

Maybe I should go back, fatty might still be there, waiting for his scooter... Hehe.

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[–] Swole_is_life 0 points 22 points (+22|-0) ago 

I feel like there's a folk tale here

The fatty who got stuck in the grocery store and went into starvation mode: "they say on a quiet night you can still hear him whining, 'but mah cundishuns...'"

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[–] trLP 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

Reading this made me really angry. The ending eased up on the anger a bit though. Asshole needs his teeth knocked out. But the ensuing liquid diet of pulverized bacon bits, mayo, grease trap runoff, and diet soda would probably make him fatter and more entitled acting.

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[–] pwn 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

Fatties just need to get beat up more. Simple as that. Only thing is nobody wants to be near one long enough to beat them up

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