[–] [deleted] 0 points 82 points (+82|-0) ago  (edited ago)

[Deleted]

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[–] fatfreelife 0 points 18 points (+18|-0) ago 

I got to this part and died, picturing some massive podgy spider with lard lips.

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[–] eapoe 0 points 9 points (+9|-0) ago 

Sheblob.

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[–] Carsandsarcasm 0 points 69 points (+69|-0) ago 

Thin privilege is not being mistaken for a sofa.

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[–] prisonersandpriests 0 points 19 points (+19|-0) ago 

But muh cundishuns fused me to the sofa!

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[–] jigaboojivetribe 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

Condition cushions.

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[–] jigaboojivetribe 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

Condition cushions.

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[–] turnonce 0 points 38 points (+38|-0) ago 

I don't know anything about swinging etiquette, but shouldn't they like... ask before molesting someone ?

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[–] Lilina 0 points 22 points (+22|-0) ago 

Fatties have no etiquette or impulse control for that matter.

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[–] Elcycs 0 points 18 points (+18|-0) ago 

Me either, but I'm guessing if a couple people start screwing on top of you it could be interpreted as an invitation...

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[–] prisonersandpriests 0 points 16 points (+16|-0) ago 

If a couple of people started screwing on top of me, I'd have bigger problems than wondering whether to join in. Things like "How did these people get in my house?" or "Yeah, she's hot, but I don't know these motherfuckers!"

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[–] Sandow [S] 0 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago 

Absolutely. But as /u/Lilina says, they have no impulse control. All parties and clubs I've gone to make it very clear that you have to verbally ask permission before touching another person, and that person has to give clear verbal consent. This means that my shitlady gets plenty of opportunities to say "I don't want you touching me" to fatties. Because they get shot down so often, hams try to avoid asking permission because they're being "tee-hee! Naughty" or "M'lady, made me forget my manners.."

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[–] Moonshine_Sonata 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

No! They've already stolen curvy, they'll have to pry naughty out of my cold dead hands. Which they'll probably eat.

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[–] turnonce 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

they're being "tee-hee! Naughty" or "M'lady, made me forget my manners.."

Imagining hams saying that was nauseating. But anyway, if people are verbally shooting them down, why would jumping in uninvited be a good idea? Does that actually work for them? Do people seriously let them in just because they go for it while other activity started?

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[–] ClairityDX 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

So let me get this straight. Since they repulse everyone they meet, instead of improving themselves, they decide it's easier to molest everyone they find attractive?

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[–] FruityRumpusAsshole 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

My thoughts exactly. I'm afraid I would have beaten the shit out of the oreogre. I actually feel very grossed out after reading this.

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[–] turnonce 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

Oreogre! hahaha that's glorious!

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[–] Leelem0n 0 points 20 points (+20|-0) ago 

Whyyyy did it think that was okay to do?

[–] [deleted] 0 points 23 points (+23|-0) ago 

[Deleted]

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[–] Sandow [S] 0 points 13 points (+13|-0) ago 

This. It's a cancerous byproduct of telling ugly hams they're beautiful. It doesn't matter if no one believes it. They start to believe it themselves.

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[–] pao_is_a_tranny 0 points 14 points (+14|-0) ago 

That's a good question. I was under the impression that proper etiquette in these places was to at least introduce yourself, and discuss what are the limits. Not jumping on people.

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[–] pwn 0 points 24 points (+24|-0) ago 

Sorry, but when was the last time a ham showed etiquette in any context?

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[–] blue5car 0 points 12 points (+12|-0) ago 

Who invites hams to these things anyway? If I'm going to be surrounded by naked people, it better hell as be fit naked people.

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[–] Mr_Wolf 0 points 8 points (+8|-0) ago 

Events range from only have to pay an admission fee and others can get more strict. Like having to submit recent std test results and or body verification.

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[–] ShitlordedByFacts 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

Starting a business that excludes 60% of the population from the get-go is a bad time. Add to it that (sorry OP, but I feel like you're an outlier, it's generally true) people into BDSM/swinging in my experience tend to be the vilest, most putrid fatties ever, and poof, you've got no customer base.

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[–] MrSaxoBeetus 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

I think it happened in a swing house, it's a business, so it lets any paying customers in.

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[–] blue5car 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

Then the last thing they would want would be to get a reputation for ham-rape.

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[–] ShitArchon 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

That explains why they take in hams. They'd be bad otherwise because they drive away the attractive people.

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[–] tiradia 0 points 12 points (+12|-0) ago 

Holllllly shit. My balls would have noped the fuck up inside of me. Now... I'm sorry fellow shitlord. :( we must put you out to pasture! Once an oreogre tastes swole/fit flesh, it hungers for more!

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[–] tdee3000 0 points 11 points (+11|-0) ago 

By not reciprocating, you literally raped the fatty on both physical and emotional levels.

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[–] Jessee 0 points 8 points (+8|-0) ago 

I got out of there faster than a refugee fleeing Syria.

Bahaha, sorry for your misfortune OP, bad things can happen to us sometimes

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