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[–] 30percenter 0 points 57 points (+57|-0) ago 

The epic epic mess that ensues when one of these fails. Toilet comes right off the wall. Landwhale rolling around in water and shit. Fatty counts it as a bath and goes home.

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[–] FattyHater 0 points 19 points (+19|-0) ago 

HAHAHAHA that's what I thought when I first saw this.

At some point in history some fatass broke the toilet off the wall and probably ruined their house with water spraying all over the place out of the wall, and this thing was invented as a result.

Thin privledge is being able to take a dump without fear of breaking the toilet off the wall.

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[–] running-shitlord 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

I have to ask... did you witness this?

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[–] 30percenter 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

Ha! No no...

 

I was just having fun imagining the scene. Like FattyHater said though, there's a reason this pig-post was invented.

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[–] hypercat 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

OH man, I saw the aftermath of a fatass destroying a regular toilet, it broke like the actual porcelain and there was a a huge bloody shitty broken toilet mess. Apparently toilets are sharp when they break.

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[–] S4lly 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

This happened at my family restaurant. Whale goes into the bathroom, sometime later she runs out of it and straight out the restaurant blubbering sweet whale tears. The bathroom was a wreck! Water and other stuff was draining out, we had to close it up and shut the water valve till we could get it fixed. -_- Not even sure how she fit in there, our building is old and not meant for big people really. Tiny doorways and hallways.

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[–] eat_a_dick_por_favor 0 points 45 points (+45|-0) ago 

If you have to install a kickstand on your toilet, it's time to take a good, hard look at your life.

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[–] MidLepLegs 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

They would, but even an elaborate system of mirrors would not give them a good look at their girth.

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[–] DerpyDoom 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

So, you're saying it'd be hard to get a good look at your life? eyebrow waggle for ridiculous rephrasing

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[–] anticlutch 0 points 28 points (+28|-0) ago 

I would constantly and intentionally sabotage it. I'm not okay with that.

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[–] Honey_Badger 0 points 11 points (+11|-0) ago 

You. I like you.

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[–] anticlutch 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

I've heard a lot about this you guy. It seems as though you is a swell fella.

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[–] 30percenter 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

This ….. If there was a "Give all upvoats" button, I would use it.

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[–] thenthingsgotworse 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

The first thing I thought of when I saw this was setting a maximum weight limit for people visiting me.

I ain't installin' that shit under my shitter.

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[–] tmo1138 [S] 0 points 24 points (+24|-0) ago 

Apparently the fat fuck actually broke the toilet off the wall, hence the "Big John".

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[–] OxfordEnglishDick 0 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago 

Out of curiosity, I looked at the Big John website to find out how fat a person would have to be to break a toilet like that.

The Big John Toilet Support mounts underneath the toilet bowl working in conjunction with the existing wall carrier to redistribute the weight and increasing the weight capacity from 350 lbs to over 1000 lbs.

Ok. I imagine the toilet wouldn't suddenly break at 351 lbs so I'm thinking the ham in question was at least 400lbs+. Though if they just plopped down as I suspect someone that fat would have to since they lack the strength to ease down, the impact would be much greater and they could have even weighed less than 350, maybe in the 300 range. Regardless, someone that fat shouldn't be allowed to leave the house.

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[–] DelusionalHominids 0 points 8 points (+8|-0) ago 

someone that fat shouldn't be allowed to live

Fixed that for ya'.

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[–] 1864652? 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

Evil idea: steal the fatty kickstand and all of its replacements. Fatty will be forced to quit after breaking a few more toilets.

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[–] StringerBell 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

Big Bad John. A great song now with added double entendre!

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[–] duannguyen 0 points 15 points (+15|-0) ago 

FFS, I mean when will it be the time when we all say.. you know.. WTF are we doing as a species?

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[–] DelusionalHominids 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

We sailed past that point long ago, my friend. We are so deep into unknown waters that nothing, no matter how bizarre, would be too unbelievable. Sure, plenty of things can still give pause, can still shock, and can still provoke, but nothing would be beyond belief at this point in time.

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[–] FreedomToast 0 points 9 points (+9|-0) ago 

This is the most significant issue that FPH is not paying attention to and it is driving me crazy. I'll write more on this, but if fat's can get the legal definition that obesity is equivalent to a disability, it is the end of FPH; FPH would be equivalent to the KKK. I don't mean that as an exaggeration, I mean this as a true legal definition; it would be a hate crime against equal human rights. This is very possible for fat-activists to have amended into law as we do not have the public majority on our side. This is a huge issue and I feel everyone is not aware of this possibility.

[–] [deleted] 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

[Deleted]

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[–] hypercat 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

The ADA would have to completely redo their standards as initially doors and ramps and toilet stalls were designed with standard sized wheelchairs in mind, not fat fucking whales. They have larger and larger wheelchairs and scooters and asses where NORMAL items break under stress. Can you imaging your restaurant choice being limited by which place had sufficiently strong chairs?

Shit, restaurants would all have to get new toilets, get rid of booths and get chair rated to at least 500 lbs if fat became a disability.

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[–] thenthingsgotworse 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

It will gradually arrive at that point, because it's already obvious that being fat is bad for your career. The fatter, the worse.

When they get public opinion to back HAMS philosophy through all those shit articles in the mainstream media which pretend losing weight is not possible, laws are sure to follow.

I just wonder what can be done when a majority is simply delusional and not interested in facts.

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[–] aftertherisotto 0 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago 

So, besides eating 10,000 calories a day, what "different abilities" do fat people possess?

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[–] DelusionalHominids 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

The ability to live with an enormous amount of shame.

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[–] l23r 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

The company doesn't even want to show photos of fat people on their website and in the product description they say "many of our products are particularly invaluable for the safety and well-being of children, senior citizens and the physically disabled.

I wonder how it must feel for a morbidly obese person who needs a stand to ensure their toilet does not crush from under their massive girth going on that website to see that even the company selling them their Fatso Toilet Bowl Protector does not want to be associated with them.

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