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[–] baddreamstonight 0 points 82 points (+82|-0) ago 

I would murder someone if they did that in my house.

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[–] phenomenaldouche 1 points 110 points (+111|-1) ago 

Be careful. With all the recent uproar about big game hunting after Cecil the lion's death, you can't just go killing a hippo or you'll get in big trouble.

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[–] baddreamstonight 0 points 18 points (+18|-0) ago  (edited ago)

Well, if the hippo is not longer useful to it's herd, I just need to find conservationists who will use the permit money to help the rest of the group. That way, you are thinning the weak and undesirable from the herd- improving overall health.

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[–] JesusHitler 0 points 14 points (+14|-0) ago 

Are you trying to say that fat lives matter? Because..no.

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[–] Margaret_Thatcher 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

But the real question is, how are they going to make an iphone out of french fries to commemorate the ambulocetean you kill?

Oh wait, they aren't because nobody cares if a fatty dies.

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[–] dildonkers 1 points 15 points (+16|-1) ago 

I would murder a fatty if they walked in my house at all.

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[–] Phillyshitlord 0 points 43 points (+43|-0) ago 

"Waffle-stomping"

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[–] tux 0 points 13 points (+13|-0) ago 

I see someone was around for the original FPH thread. ;)

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[–] Phillyshitlord 0 points 11 points (+11|-0) ago 

Oh yea, original flaired user here.

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[–] prisonersandpriests 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

It's a bit like the monster mash, but not nearly as hygienic.

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[–] ScreaminMime 0 points 13 points (+13|-0) ago 

"He did the mash

He did the waaaaafle mash

He did the mash

It twas a barnyard bash..."

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[–] ShitlordLovesOreos 0 points 31 points (+31|-0) ago 

This is a reply to the infamous Ziplock bag, baby wipes, and a tablespoon aka "The Package" post.

[–] [deleted] 0 points 35 points (+35|-0) ago 

[Deleted]

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[–] briibeezieee 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

All you have to do... Is NOT eat!! Isn't that what they're good at? Not doing things???

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[–] Drdian 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

these links honestly need to be saved permanently to have on hand when someone gives the old "me being fat isn't hurting anyone" fatlogic argument. Shit is fucking disgusting.

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[–] DeVera 0 points 9 points (+9|-0) ago 

Oh Jesus! I didn't think it was possible but I nite hate fat people more. To think they would rather device complicated ways to wipe their huge asses rather than lose weight... they don't deserve what life has given them.

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[–] geddy 0 points 7 points (+7|-0) ago 

That entire topic is literally cancer. What the fuck is wrong with those people? Do they have no shame, at all? What a cesspool of fatlogic, at it's worst. Jesus christ I am so repulsed right now.

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[–] Sideshow_Bob 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

That guy needs to buy a bidet.

[–] [deleted] 0 points 16 points (+16|-0) ago  (edited ago)

[Deleted]

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[–] lava 0 points 30 points (+30|-0) ago 

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[–] HowieCameUnglued 0 points 9 points (+9|-0) ago 

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[–] lava 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

"Dammit Harold!"

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[–] fuck_communism 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

I have that same toilet, and the matching sink!

Side note: how desperate for cash do you have to be to pose for a stock photo of painful shitting/pissing?

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[–] DeVera 0 points 14 points (+14|-0) ago 

In what sick forum are people discussing this crap? That is just sickening! How can that filthy creature just not lose weight?

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[–] ShitlordLovesOreos 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

Context provided here.

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[–] FatFreddyFreekowtski 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

BECAUSE MUH CONDISHUNS

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[–] ChicagoSunroof 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

I think everyone left on reddit is fat! Why would a normal person want to be there?

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[–] HowNowPaoCow 1 points 13 points (+14|-1) ago 

Just fucking go outside and shit on the ground, like an animal.

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[–] running-shitlord 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

Hey now, I have to do this on my long backpacking trips.... though I tend to carry a trowel and dig a hole first...

Never mind carry on

[–] [deleted] 0 points 11 points (+11|-0) ago 

[Deleted]

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[–] SkinnyMcShitlord 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago  (edited ago)

For genuinely disabled people, these kinds of inventions (wiping sticks) are a godsend that allows them to have privacy and independence using the toilet.

If your mobility is restricted due to disability it's far preferable to use some kind of wiping aid than to ask a spouse, relative or carer to do it for you.

If you have a choice in the matter though (i.e. stop eating so much you can't reach your butt) then I really can't understand the mentality behind it!

I especially don't understand the idea of shitting in the shower or using a fucking spoon to wipe. They seem so proud of their "inventions" but why would you do that when you can literally buy something that's specially designed for exactly that purpose?!

If you're not embarrassed by waffle stomping or wiping with a spoon then you shouldn't be embarrassed to buy a proper wiping tool!!

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[–] l23r 0 points 11 points (+11|-0) ago 

TIL never to let a morbidly obese person use my bathroom.

Even if they tried to use the toilet, they'd break that too, since both of them are the kind that attach into the wall instead of the ground.

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[–] KinglyWeevil 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

the kind that attach into the wall instead of the ground

I bet your bathroom is incredibly easy to clean. It just occurred to me that the hardest part of cleaning my bathroom is sweeping/mopping between the toilet and tub, and behind the toilet. Just impossible to get anything under/behind there.

I shall consider this option if I ever remodel...

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[–] l23r 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

When I lived in a bathroom with a toilet on the ground, I just used the rag that I cleaned the outside of the bowl with (I'm one of those "OCD" people who wipes the entire toilet down) to clean the floor around the bowl. It didn't take that much longer... but thinking about it, it is easier to clean the bathroom now.

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