Hello you lovely flab fighters. I have a little story for you, of which I will have many, due to the fact that there are literally so many obese fucks out there :)!
I caught this particular ham bitching about me and my size recently, so I guess it makes me feel better to put her on here.
I work with this mayonnaise magnet, we shall call Mayogirl. She's in her mid twenties but gets mistaken for mid thirties all the time. She puts zero effort into her appearance, like she doesn't shower and is easily 250+lbs. She tries to make herself look smaller by constantly breathing in, which makes zero difference when your gut is protruding from the rest of your body by a metre. She also always wears black because its 'slimming'! And those skinny waist belts, designed to look chic, if you are slim and know how to dress yourself.
We were talking about plans for Christmas, who normally hosts and what they cook etc. Conversation went a little like this...
Mayogirl: So who normally hosts the Christmas meal in your family? I never host as it's too much work!
(she also still lives at home, with her 5 cats and enabling parents so she couldn't possibly host, but she doesn't know that I know that)
Me: I normally host, for around 15 family members and myself, it's not too much work if you plan ahead...
Mayogirl: I just can't be bothered with it all. Why make all that food if you won't even get to eat it all.
Me: Well I do sit down to eat with them, too...I don't sit in the corner and starve.
Mayogirl: Yeah but I bet you still count your calories, you don't eat enough! What's your favourite part of the Christmas meal?? Mine has to be Yorkshire puddings with bacon and honey!!
At this point she is practically salivating.
Me: Yorkshire puddings with bacon and honey? I've never had that...
Mayogirl: Yeah, you cook it all together, like the Yorkshire pudding is a pot and the bacon and honey go inside it. So yummy. I have to stop myself from eating the whole lot (teehee)
Me: Ah, well I like roasted parsnips and peas. I don't think the holidays are a reason to blindly gorge.
Mayogirl: Omg!! You actually like vegetables?? I knew there was something wrong with you, lol!!
Me: They are hands down the best part of the meal. I don't eat meat and I always look closely at what I am putting in my body, as everyone should.
Conversation ended there. Where she realised she made herself look like a total butterhuffer.
Am I the only one who can control myself around food at christmas, as I do every other day of the year?
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[–] 21845558? ago (edited ago)
I don't count calories over the holidays. On christmas eve, which is the big feasting day where I live, I just don't eat anything else
The smoked turkey my dad makes is fucking bomb, not to mention the gravlax on rye bread