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[–] plant_hunter 0 points 174 points (+174|-0) ago 

Bravo! Stairways are shitlord heavens.

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[–] comicsansmasterfont 0 points 61 points (+61|-0) ago 

There's a reason no one knows the classic song "Elevator to Heaven"

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[–] senpaithatignoresyou 0 points 25 points (+25|-0) ago 

Did the singer die of a heart attack before his career took off?

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[–] PoopToaster 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

Mostly because condishuns and juhneticks didn't exist until much later in the "everyone is awesome even if you suck" world that happened in the 90s.

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[–] senpaithatignoresyou 0 points 103 points (+103|-0) ago 

Brilliant!!!

Thin privilege is being able to fend off unwanted advances with stairs

furthermore, if anyone ever tried to give you shit for this, here is a magic spell that would chase them away:" If she was really that interested in me, she would have walked up the stairs with me, and continued the conversation"

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[–] Phillyshitlord 0 points 45 points (+45|-0) ago 

Are you female? Because that is a deliciously cutting but friendly and innocent sounding remark that so sweet I'm over my calorie limit today.

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[–] senpaithatignoresyou 0 points 28 points (+28|-0) ago 

Nope, Just a dude that has observed enough women in their natural environment to know how truly nasty they can be.

Also been married for 8 years, so you pick up on stuff.

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[–] KikiCat 0 points 12 points (+12|-0) ago 

Or "I thought she used that as a excuse to ditch me. Who am I to be a creeper?" And congrats on creating a condition that makes her the bad guy if she insists on the elevator.

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[–] Malek 0 points 68 points (+68|-0) ago 

Ah gravity. The obeasts natural enemy.

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[–] NotMrS 0 points 33 points (+33|-0) ago 

By far my favorite shitlord is gravity!

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[–] meateatercat 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

Hey! What is that SCP thing that comes up when I hover over your username?

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[–] TheGo2SWATking 0 points 8 points (+8|-0) ago 

Oppressive! Give us floating hoverchairs in an environment like Wall-E! Thin privilege! /s

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[–] Snargle 0 points 48 points (+48|-0) ago 

Physics is the best shitlord there is.

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[–] BeeGeeAllin 0 points 23 points (+23|-0) ago 

It's like reading a quote from Neil deGrasse Tyson.

"I gazed through the Hubble telescope in awe and wonder, when suddenly, it dawned on me. Physics is the best shitlord there is."

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[–] Nahfuckreddit 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

I need this on a tshirt!

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[–] NotMrS 0 points 9 points (+9|-0) ago 

I still say gravity just because I love seeing fat people fall!

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[–] Snargle 0 points 10 points (+10|-0) ago 

Gravity is why they fall, physics is why they snap their foot off like a toothpick when they fall.

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[–] supernatendo 0 points 29 points (+29|-0) ago 

That's some quick thinking there. It keeps you safe from the SJW school kangaroo court because you didn't have to resort to gasp telling the truth, and it got rid of her just as easily.

I wish we lived in a world that accepted us for being honest shitlords and shitladies, but I don't think we are going to see that in our lifetimes.

[–] [deleted] 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

[Deleted]

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[–] 1266961 1 points 15 points (+16|-1) ago  (edited ago)

Shit. I accidentally deleted my comment. Didn't mean to do that.

I said, I think we can get where we need to go if we just hit obesity harder. Try to show it's an addiction and disease more. It's treatable disease. It's like having cancer and refusing chemo, but visiting Chernobyl. Or having the clap and "Loving you boils".

Pretty much any response they have you can equate to what a heroin addict or alcoholic would say about giving up their addiction. Hit the fact that fat kids are literally dumber enough and people will start to stigmatize fat. If fats are the only vocal group it'll only get worse.

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[–] Allchiefedup24 0 points 24 points (+24|-0) ago 

We have a new champion! Tune in next week to see if you've got what it takes to, "LOSE THE FATTY."

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[–] 32DDbitches 0 points 8 points (+8|-0) ago  (edited ago)

Haha!! I can see this in a Running Man kind of setting.

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[–] cybridlines 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

except nobody is going to physically run in this show

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[–] dotty 0 points 16 points (+16|-0) ago 

HAHA. What a pathetic piece of nothing. She probably went home and wrote a tumblr blog about how stairs were made by the patriarchy to shame fat womynz.

P.S. I read your post in my head in an Australian accent and it made it so much better. Aussie accents are the best (I'm American).

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[–] ScottRockview 0 points 13 points (+13|-0) ago  (edited ago)

I don't have any stairs at work, but this just gave me a great idea for anybody who doesn't have stairs to run up: Say you're going for a jog and invite the fatty to come. It will make up some kind of excuse to which we can reply "That's bullshit, your can be healthy at any size so don't give into society's fucked up view of beauty standards, come on, let's run". Then you leave it behind heaving on the ground in a pool of it's own sweat and tears.

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[–] romancethecello 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

I'm going to use this everytime, with a shitlord-eating grin too.

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