[–] Carsandsarcasm 0 points 20 points (+20|-0) ago 

I agree. You won't want to be the one who has to learn they died second hand. Get that news yourself and be the one to break the story.

[–] Placetohide 0 points 17 points (+17|-0) ago 

But they get mad when I turn the hose on them.

[–] Scooter_Death 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

They should be thanking you. How else are they going to bathe? How ungrateful.

[–] Placetohide 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

Yeah really. You try to do someone a favor ...

[–] MoltenFat 0 points 10 points (+10|-0) ago 

"You are not doing okay" all the fucking time. You are fat. Fat, fat and fat That's not okay, and even if you don't always feel it because like a boiling frog you forgot how being fit feels like, in truth, you feel miserable all the fucking time.

An alcoholic has seven reasons to keep on drinking - Monday, Tuesday... - Fatties need only one reason to not feel good - being a fatty!

[–] Charlez6 0 points 10 points (+10|-0) ago 

It's perfectly healthy to be obese and also heat presents a significantly greater health risk to them. Hmmmm... Don't dare encourage them to achieve a healthier weight but also you are responsible for checking on their poor health. Hmmmmmm...

[–] enginedriver13 0 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago 

“Check on them”—hey, this could be a good thing. If they’re immobile, you can crank up the furnace, the oven, and put a space heater nearby to hasten Lord Beetus’ work. What are they going to do....chase you?

[–] AlanTuringsGhost 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 


[–] jennyanydots817 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

Ha. The problem solves itself.

The only friends of fats are other fats, so they're supposed to check on each other. Since they have eaten themselves immobile, that's not going to happen. Win-win!

[–] MASSdestruction 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

Are you dead yet? Are you dead yet? Are you dead yet? Are you dead yet?

[–] christ93 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

I have no fat friends so this should be easy.

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