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[–] Carsandsarcasm 0 points 14 points (+14|-0) ago 

Fat people like to say that us thinnies have no idea what it's like to lose a lot of weight. They are wrong, however. By dropping this friend, you lost a couple of hundred pounds, and not only that, but every pound he gains from now is a pound you lost. Then consider that every hamplanet friend he gains in his new lifestyle represents yet more hundreds of pounds you successfully avoided. Over a lifetime, we must lose thousands of pounds.

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[–] callthehambulance [S] 0 points 7 points (+7|-0) ago 

You're right. Thank you for that, I really appreciate the sentiment.

I think it hurts because we were together a long whiles - nearly three years -and we loved one another deeply. But it turned into something unhealthy. And instead of him being willing or able to work on that, he settled for a shitty unhealthy life.

I guess my perspective on it as a former fat kid is pretty interesting. I can understand what it's like to grow up with shitty habits and how profoundly hard it is to change one's thinking too. It is really difficult and I have a tremendous amount of empathy for anyone who goes through a change like that because it is hard.

But it's possible too. So for me, it was doubly frustrating because he was healthy, developed shitty habits and then, decided he couldn't be arsed to deal with it.

I'm gonna train for that half marathon I want to run. I'm cool with 10ks, and because of the health issues I have (I have a brain tumour) I know I'll need to take it steady and careful on working towards a half marathon. So I'm gonna work on that.

The really pathetic thing is, we live in separate cities and I've been busy with work and Uni, so I really didn't build much of a social life where I live when I moved here last year. But I have a chance to do that now and it'll be easier now I no longer have to worry about going to see him.

Sorry for the rambly shit post, but thank you for the reply.

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[–] Carsandsarcasm 0 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago 

I can see you need to talk :)

This is the harsh reality of standing by your beliefs, unfortunately. You are going to lose some friends and make some enemies along the way. Not every relationship you have is going to be around forever and this is the case regardless of anything. However, when it comes to fat hate considering the scale of the obesity epidemic, we are in a very special situation where it is extremely common to lose friends and extremely hard to find them, especially ones that stick. I think the main perspective to take is that you cannot control the actions of others, and if they are going to let themselves slide into a miserable, fat existence, then that is their choice and there is nothing you can do about it. To keep these people around only serves to keep around someone who is the opposition of everything you want in your life and that is unhelpful at best and actively detrimental at worst. I hate the term for the SJW associations, but fat people are "toxic" people and will drag you down, or will at least try to. You can only focus on making new friends and hope that they fill the gap you need in a permanent way.