0
14

[–] Carsandsarcasm 0 points 14 points (+14|-0) ago 

Just keep doing what you are doing. Before long, Lord Beetus will come for the finger and problem solved.

0
1

[–] Thereturnstudent 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

@carsandsarcasm you are on FIRE today!

0
9

[–] shifty_pete 0 points 9 points (+9|-0) ago 

For what purpose? You're never getting married.

0
8

[–] mmmmdonuts 0 points 8 points (+8|-0) ago 

Once in a while a gross fat will settle for another gross fat.

0
0

[–] RustyEquipment [S] 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

the illusion of happiness is important!

0
9

[–] RustyEquipment [S] 0 points 9 points (+9|-0) ago 

Reddit knows their customer base

0
6

[–] Placetohide 0 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago 

White lithium grease? Or maybe lose some weight - just kidding, they'll never do that.

0
4

[–] RustyEquipment [S] 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

they do... but they arent alive for it

0
6

[–] Artie 0 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago 

Those convex fingers, bleck.

0
2

[–] RustyEquipment [S] 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

sausage prototypes

0
4

[–] rshackleford252525 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

step 1 find a beta pigfucker...

0
4

[–] FeedMeTheTruth 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago  (edited ago)

I recommend reducing your daily caloric intake to 1600 for 6 to 18 months depending on the amount of weight you have to lose. Couple this with walking for 10 minutes a day to start, and working your way up from there to longer walking trips, strength training, and more intense cardio. Ring will fall right off and you may need to have it downsized.

0
0

[–] RustyEquipment [S] 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

Lol don’t gotta tell me that!

0
4

[–] REEEperMan 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

Life hack: not putting a ring on your fat sausage of a finger will save you a trip to the ER to get it off when you realise it's cutting off all the circulation.

0
4

[–] GreffeduFoie 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

There are silicone wedding bands that were originally made for people with jobs that require your hands a lot (like mechanics and medical staff) that break instead of degloving your finger. Soon they'll make extra stretchy ones to accommodate hams letting themselves go after getting married.

0
2

[–] RustyEquipment [S] 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

degloving.... ugh.... yeah gloves in the Army at all times basically... cause we heard stories of this... degloving... then we saw pictures!

load more comments ▼ (7 remaining)