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[–] Carsandsarcasm 0 points 84 points (+84|-0) ago 

Something old: Their biological age.

Something new: Their latest condishun that prevents weight loss.

Something borrowed: Time.

Something blue: Their feet from poor circulation.

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[–] Lurkerontheroof 1 points 6 points (+7|-1) ago  (edited ago)

DAMN girl! There needs to be a Voat Pulitzer-type prize to submit your comments for, this is extra-golden!

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[–] Carsandsarcasm 0 points 24 points (+24|-0) ago 

The prize, as always, is not being a fat fuck.

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[–] heybaebay 2 points 4 points (+6|-2) ago 

Hahah love it dude, keep it up

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[–] trigger_piggers 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

You win the internet this is gold

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[–] Chichadios 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

Best comment I've ever read on here

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[–] BodyType_Potato [S] 0 points 28 points (+28|-0) ago  (edited ago)

Bonus: her arm is BIGGER THAN HER HEAD

I don't know why, but fat arms in particular disgust me. It seems to be a pretty universal way to tell a human from a hambeast in cropped photos. Body fat compositions vary from person to person, i.e. fat legs, fat stomach, etc, but all fatties automatically get that gross fat arm thing

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[–] PenguinOrgy 0 points 12 points (+12|-0) ago 

Have you ever had the misfortune of grabbing one of those fat, flabby arms? I have. It's so soft and squishy and clammy and gross, feels like picking up a dog turd with one of those super thin little baggies. Smells about the same too.

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[–] Fatshion-Fupa 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

And future fats usually have pudgy arms for their frame when they are young too. Fat arms are a sure predictor of a ham or future ham.

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[–] DevilsMonkey 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

Around here the girls seem to carry excess fat in their thighs first. Which is really handy as it's getting cold now and everyone is bundled up in big coats. But I can always instantly see who's a secret fat and who's not with a quick glance to the upper legs.

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[–] AltamontPass 0 points 19 points (+19|-0) ago 

The bride is so obese she needs to wear a bib to eat at her wedding. I just... I don't think there's any commentary needed here. A picture is truly worth a thousand words...

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[–] Sarcastatron_9000 0 points 10 points (+10|-0) ago 

I thought the bib was because they were eating something messy for their wedding meal, until I realized they were eating normal food and the bib was because she's so fat she can't sit close enough to the table to eat over her plate. Holy fuck.

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[–] Dark_Shroud 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

Yeah one of the comments mentioned planning to use an apron because they were planning BBQ for their wedding. That at least makes sense vs just being a disgusting slob trying to consume as much as possible.

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[–] BodyType_Potato [S] 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

Holy shiiiiiit, you're right. That's horrifying.

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[–] Lurkerontheroof 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

Holy fuck indeed 0_o

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[–] TheStapler 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

I've worked in the wedding industry and I've never heard of a bridal bib. Of course the first time I see it, it's on two assholes so fat, they are beyond deathfat and into "how are they not already dead?" fat.

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[–] REEEperMan 0 points 15 points (+15|-0) ago 

If you're an adult human that needs a bib while eating at your own wedding, you better have some debilitating motor neuron disease or some shit to justify it, otherwise just eat out of a trough like a proper pig.

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[–] Dark_Shroud 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

At least one of the comments mentioned an apron because they were planning BBQ.

I will eat meals standing up holding a plate vs sitting at a table with a hogs like this. Watching them shovel the food in is disgusting, actual pigs at least chew their food.

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[–] devoresekk 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago  (edited ago)

BBQ can be messy, but you can still eat it like a human without getting it all over yourself. We can just lean forward so that we're close to the plate, instead of having to shovel across our entire torso. It's a wedding, not a frat party.

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[–] ETres 0 points 9 points (+9|-0) ago 

Normal couples who let themselves go after marriage DO NOT respect one another (or themselves). My wife and I have been married 30 years, and staying attractive to one another has been a cornerstone of our successful marriage. I have too much respect for her and myself to "let myself go." We hug, we make-out, we admire each other's naked bodies. Couldn't, wouldn't do that if we're disgusting piles of goo. It's becoming evermore apparent that we are weird in this regard.

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[–] FattyWannaCracker 0 points 8 points (+8|-0) ago 

I honestly don't remember the food at our wedding at all. I definitely didn't have a bib to pig out. Also, I eat like a human, so I wasn't concerned about getting slops on my dress like this sow.

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[–] BodyType_Potato [S] 0 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago 

Right? Like, me getting food on my clothes has literally never been an issue. I can't imagine it will suddenly become an issue on my wedding day. This is just tacky.

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[–] dontdoxxmebro 0 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago 

I spill food on myself frequently. My waistline however, not at all sloppy.

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[–] miles2go 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

Exactly! We spent a lot of time and money on our wedding meal but I enjoyed it at the tasting because I knew I wouldn’t care about it or have time to care about it that day. It was the least of my concerns once we chose the meals. I couldn’t imagine spending time and money caring this much about a bib. They probably didn’t leave those seats for the entire reception. Gross.

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[–] AnechoicMedia 1 points 7 points (+8|-1) ago 

Nobody that fat deserves to be happy.

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[–] Dark_Shroud 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

She only looks happy because she's eating. If her pig fucker sicks with her long term hopefully the piece of shit gets a life insurance policy sooner than later so he isn't a financial drain on the system in his later years.

I'll be surprised if she makes 50, small fats tend to make it a decade or two longer.

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[–] rshackleford252525 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

Plot twist: shes been married 5 times

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[–] theepilepticferret 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

Once for each hundred pounds

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