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[–] CaffeineDitz 0 points 26 points (+26|-0) ago  (edited ago)

That freaking sucks. I went to a stripclub to experince it a while back with my husband. It was great. All the girls were super friendly (I know, they were working, but still) and thankfully no lardasses around us.

Though the slimmest girl was absolutely the most impressive. Climbed up that pole with grace, 9 feet up, looking awesome as all hell.

I do have respect for quality strippers. Entertainment, conversation and drunken customer wrangling while wearing those outfits or being naked? Mad props!

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[–] FatShamingShitLady 0 points 12 points (+12|-0) ago 

They could give a few olympic gymnasts a run for their money, from what I've seen in the past. dat core strength tho!!

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[–] CaffeineDitz 0 points 10 points (+10|-0) ago 

Hell yes! That core strength is amazing!

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[–] Fupachabra 0 points 8 points (+8|-0) ago 

I went with a cousin recently and I was really impressed by how the girls moved and gracefully climbed too. There was one really adorable girl that danced for us, and they were all really attentive because we surely came off as lesbians.

Then there was her...

This 300ish pound lard breather comes out and we IMMEDIATELY left.

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[–] CaffeineDitz 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

Oh. My. God... would have demanded my entry fee back immediately if a 180ish lbs thing came out, let alone a 300lbs blob!

I mean... some of the girls were larger than me, but none overweight that I could see... and shitlord as I am the slimmer girls got way more funny money than the curvier ones. Then again we held court in a separate part if the club with a gaggle of strippers around us so we missed a lot of the lower quality dancers.

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[–] spareribs 0 points 18 points (+18|-0) ago 

Switch up clubs

There's no future in a hippo spot

Tryouts a pain but will be worth it if you can move

Bonus shot points if you tell new club the reason

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[–] Carsandsarcasm 0 points 15 points (+15|-0) ago 

But why would she change the sizes? She could just as easily bring in larger sizes on top of the existing range while keeping the scale the same. Why change what a small is? That seems almost needlessly annoying.

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[–] Mr_Wolf 0 points 9 points (+9|-0) ago 

To save herself from the mental gymnastics

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[–] wildSHITLORDappeared 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

Same reason vanity sizing exists outside of strip clubs? Whales don't want to be told they're XXXXXXXXXL. Don't worry about objective reality saying that you have a 90" waist, the label says "Medium!" Don't worry that people scales don't have 4 digits so they can't accurately weigh you, your Yay! Scale reads "Beautiful!"

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[–] HitlerDinduNufin 0 points 14 points (+14|-0) ago 

Stripper eh? Ive never actually been to a strip club, but from what I can tell in movies, the clientele seems quite vocal, and often drunk. Why are they not telling the fat fucks to get the fuck off the fucking stage? why is anyone paying money to see a Pork Trust with no clothes on?

Why did your club hire the buttermunguses in the first place?

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[–] meow_cow 1 points 6 points (+7|-1) ago 

Most full nude clubs don't serve alcohol. The DJ's usually keep telling us to yell.

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[–] HitlerDinduNufin 0 points 11 points (+11|-0) ago 

Hollywood lied to me.

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[–] HamSalad 0 points 11 points (+11|-0) ago 

Yeah, I always thought that was weird. Up here in Canada, they serve alcohol, very overpriced alcohol, but at least you aren't getting sober as the night goes on.

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[–] altident 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

I've been all over the country, and I've never been to a full nude strip club that didn't serve alcohol. The only strip club I've been to that didn't sell alcohol was no nudity (pasties only) and was BYOB. They would take your alcohol at the door and serve it to you.

What state are you in that doesn't serve alcohol in strip clubs?

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[–] Plavonica 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

Most of the ones that I've been to have a booth in the parking lot or across the street. You pay the man $20 and he holds on to your alcohol in an ice chest for ya. Sometimes you have to get mixers from the club, other times the booth guy has 'em. Damned near always there's a place selling alcohol within sight as well.

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[–] Gizmomax 0 points 12 points (+12|-0) ago 

Am I missing something? Why would any man pay good money to go to a club and see ugly fat women? Don't they get pissed with the bait and switch?

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[–] syntaxaxe 0 points 12 points (+12|-0) ago  (edited ago)

Do you know a lot of good men that spend their lives in strip clubs?

In younger days, I worked in a restaurant in a downtown of a significant US city, so of course I was surrounded by strip clubs. The men I'd see go in these places were nearly all slobs, hams, drunks, and so on. You'd see the occasional group that looked like a bachelor party, but considering the number of times people get married in a lifetime, it's understandable that these were not the majority.

These are the kind of guys who are not really in a position to be choosy, so far as I can tell.

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[–] DietSodaLuvr 0 points 12 points (+12|-0) ago 

If you're going to pay for a fantasy, at least pay for a good fantasy. Not some pig you could easily get with no effort, a shit job, and a shit body.

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[–] Gizmomax 0 points 7 points (+7|-0) ago 

I guess I'm guilty of falling for the Hollywood portrayal of strip clubs filled with sexy, thin girls. If I were a guy, no way would I spend time or money looking at lardasses.

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[–] ScreaminMime 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

Cuz instead of dollars you can tip them Twinkies!

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[–] RoBatten 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

It might be required . . .

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[–] undertheshills 0 points 7 points (+7|-0) ago 

jabba the ho

this made the whole story worth it.

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[–] ScreaminMime 0 points 7 points (+7|-0) ago  (edited ago)

landwhales infiltrating my club

I thought you were going to tell a story about a patron.

Dancers?!?!?

Ahhh hell no, you need to jump that ship before their declining reputation affects yours for having worked there.

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[–] different_to_a_duck 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

I can understand big companies mark XL clothing as L or even M (manatee, not medium), to appease their customer base and possibly increase sales.

But mislabeling, just to stop some spoiled fatties from complaining that nothing fits, is just wrong.

Have you considered writing an anonymous email to your club, saying you won't be coming here any longer because of all the fatties?

I've never been to a strip club, but if there were fatties on stage, I'd immediately walk out if I was to wander into one in the first place.

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[–] ThrowawayforFPH [S] 0 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago 

I've thought about it, but I'm in Seattle where every other club is owned by rick's, which is owned by the mob, and I don't want to get involved with that shit.

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[–] ETres 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

As I stated in another thread, we were in Seattle last month, and I was shocked to see as many lard-ass ladies there as I routinely see here in Texas. Unfortunately for you, maybe the local talent pool for quality strippers is just too shallow.

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