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[–] iheartmypuppy 0 points 37 points (+37|-0) ago  (edited ago)

A lot of shops I go to seem to only hire very attractive people, it must be part of the application process. and so they tend to only want to help attractive people. This means that every time I go shopping I get to witness fatties getting mad because: 1. they're surrounded by unapologetic shitlords and 2. they're being ignored.

I have yet to see a single landwhale manage to get into a dressing room at the local Tilly's, since they write your name on the door and you keep that room until you leave. They have random names on all the empty rooms too and just erase them as customers need them. Unless they don't like you, then they tell you all the rooms are full so they can save space for actual people. I know this because one time when I was there a ham was trying to get a room and the employee was telling her no, there aren't any free even though the ham pointed out one was clearly unoccupied, and as i walked by the employee said "hey, do you need your fitting room now?" and I was like "uh. sure?" so she let me in the one they were fighting about and said "sorry. i was saving it for {checks door} Cassie" (that's not my name) and the ham got mad and stormed off after kicking a rack.

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[–] MuscleMouse 0 points 21 points (+21|-0) ago  (edited ago)

That is really smart of Tilly's; I bet it keeps their clothes from getting ripped by delusional hams or soiled by sweaty hams.

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[–] TacoLight 0 points 10 points (+10|-0) ago 

Sweet small victory... when you know hard work paysoff.

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[–] FatJavalina 0 points 8 points (+8|-0) ago 

I rarely do more than blow extra air out of my nose at funny things. This made me laugh...a lot...and my day is made. Thank you so much for making me a happy shitlady!
There's one upscale mall in my city that isn't as blunt as that (I wish they were), but they don't carry clothing beyond a large, and most of the stores are tightly packed in small spaces, so only humans can fit.

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[–] lava 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

Wherever you shop sounds awesome

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[–] Eunideen [S] 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

Tilly's

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[–] invisiblecalories 0 points 24 points (+24|-0) ago 

When I was younger I worked as a cashier. Quickly got promoted to head cashier because the job was populated by lazy fats who ask for fucking stools to do their job, because it's so impossible to stand for 8 hours. We had a few old women who weren't great with computers but they were infinitely better workers than the hams. We get this new manager, the kind of fat who looks perpetually pregnant. She's nice to everyone except me and the one other young, attractive girl. Whatever, my job is cake, let her be a bitch. Another manager she didn't know I was friends with tells me to watch out, hammy is trying to find a reason to get me fired. Are you fucking kidding me? I can't imagine being such an insecure pussy that I overlooked someone's work performance - to the point of getting them fired - just because they were better looking than me. Weak, they're all weak.

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[–] PickUpPutDown 0 points 11 points (+11|-0) ago 

I was hired to replace woman on maternity leave. The department I worked in was entirely women, most of them in their early 30s. The nature of the job required me to work literally side-by-side with this obeast of a woman. I was in my early 20s, I'm 6'2 and muscular, and the only guy in the entire department, but I've got a girlfriend, and these woman are mostly older and married/in a long term relationship. I've got absolutely no interest, I just want to work. Obeast is, of course, friends with the 2 other hams in the department, like they naturally group up in the wild to talk shit about the rest of the girls in the office, who were skinny. My job required me to work with her 2 friend hams the most, something she had arranged by design in her years there. Fine. No problem. I'll happily listen to them bitch about skinny girls and watch them stuff their faces all day, I really enjoyed the work, and I'm not going to shitlord my new coworkers, I can put up with it.

So after 2-3 days of orientation in the department I get the building-wide tour. One of my last stops is this little department that has 2 fat guys sitting around in it. So I'm going around shaking hands and introducing myself, and one of them just flat out ignores me. Really awkward, so I just moved on. Later I find out that he's husband ham to the obeast I'm training with. He then proceeds to flat-out ignore me every time we're near each other, as do the other 2. I would watch as they ignored my support tickets, shit like hey the password I'm given for software xyz which I need to actually work isn't correct (they have the database), for things and came down to help friend hams with their shit. I would have to use friend hams as a go-between to get anything from them.

So by the second week the friend hams are becoming more hostile. I just keep my head down and do my work, and just act cheery with everybody. By the third week obeast woman who was supposed to spend a month training me was just getting me to sit across the department and work on my own. Ham friends would clomp around the office in high heels and not even look at me, rest of the office and I get along splendidly, but unfortunately I don't get to work closely with any of the other women. By the end of the 3rd week a lady comes in from another department looking for me. In my training I made a lot of cross-department friends, and I'm also the only young strong guy around, and she wants my help moving boxes for an event after lunch. Ten minutes later boss who hired me and I haven't seen since comes in, fires me.

No climactic event. I was on a trial period as all new employees are, and they could do whatever they wanted without having to pay severance, etc.. Later found out that obeast husband, wife, and her fucking ham friends had a meeting with him and complained about me. Hell if I know what they came up with, but that was the end of it. The boss and HR lady seemed to know it was bullshit, and they gave me a ridiculous severance that I wasn't entitled to after only being there 3 weeks (more than I made in the 3 weeks, and it was a pretty well-paying job).

Ran into somebody at the gym a month later, and learned they hired another fat girl to replace me. This was hands down my worst experience with these creatures.

I fucking hate fat people.

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[–] CakeTrap 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

That's ridiculous that they were so insecure they bitched until they forced you out.

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[–] DishingShitLikeA 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

Damn dude. At least you didn't totally get boned though. Fuck those fatsacks

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[–] MoonsOverMyHammy 0 points 11 points (+11|-0) ago 

That sounds about right. I don't mean to be sexist because I am not at all, but female ham bosses are the worst. I got hired to cocktail as a teen and when I walked in the ham owner told me I had to leave and change because my black work pants were "too sexy." They were literally Dickies. So I bought some old lady grandma pants and even then she sighed and begrudgingly allowed me to work. A customer came in and sexually harassed me terribly to the point I nearly cried, but instead of sticking up for me she implied I deserved it. So I planned to leave and told a bunch of people I would cover their shifts the next week. I signed off so they didn't get in trouble. When she called me to see why I wasn't in for the shift I was covering I said "I won't be in.... Ever." and hung up.

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[–] invisiblecalories 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

It definitely left a bad impression for the future. I still don't understand how people like her get into supervisory positions, especially when you openly admit discriminatory tendencies. Your situation is also funny, employees should look their best. Dumpy presentation isn't drumming up more business.

[–] [deleted] 0 points 23 points (+23|-0) ago  (edited ago)

[Deleted]

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[–] Doctor_Mathematics 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

They always ask as if going to the grocery and having willpower is impossible. They want that shortcut that makes them lose 300 lbs without having to do anything.

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[–] billnyethenaziguy 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

This is similar to all the weaboos on /r/learnjapanese who just want to be like "I know like all the hiragana how come I can't decipher my animu?" They want to be able to do it yet they don't even try.

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[–] TopShitlord 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

Watch out for the fats though, they'll try to sabotage you with any chance they get. For instance those who make baked goods or order junk food and offer you some.

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[–] Kahlo 0 points 17 points (+17|-0) ago 

The only other girl in our office who was even remotely my age was talking shit about how I must have huge thighs since I wear dresses all the time, no way was I so skinny. She must have had no life at all...

But anyways, I showed up in pants to the confusion of those who knew me. The lardbeast then started rumors that I was anorexic and a cokehead. Really just dumb stuff, flailing for any excuse to put me down.

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[–] Llibby 0 points 7 points (+7|-0) ago 

I think something's wrong with your flair... ...or I'm turning gay

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[–] Kahlo 0 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago 

I am of the female variety, I swear. I just didn't want to bother mods to change something so inconsequential

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[–] Elcycs 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

I'd go gay before I went fat.

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[–] TopShitlord 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

A shitlord can be either a man or a woman.. A shitlady is only used to describe women.

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[–] GlipGlops 0 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago 

A long time ago, I had been pretty fit and muscular, then I was on a car accident. Nothing too serious, but a lot of back and neck pain that required about 6 months of physical therapy to work through before I could pick up my regular exercise regimen again. In the meantime I lost a lot of muscle mass. I too had fatties claiming I was a drug addict because I got so skinny, instead of you know, being empathetic with someone injured through no fault of their own. Was yet another occurrence that led me to be a shitlord.

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[–] Kahlo 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

I went through something similar, too! My spine and lefthand pelvis were fractured in a car accident. The Fentanyl, oxycodone etc dropped me below 100 lbs at 5' 9". It was really hard to develop the muscle mass back... my obliques are still underdeveloped even now. That experience was a real bitch but at least I wasn't working and subjected to ridicule. I'm sorry to hear you went through that and I'm really happy to hear that you got through it!

[–] [deleted] 0 points 14 points (+14|-0) ago 

[Deleted]

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[–] MoonsOverMyHammy 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

You know mermaids are a lore that actually came about because sailors saw manatees and didn't know what they were. It cracks me up how fat people think they're giving themselves some compliment with the comparison.

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[–] joshy83 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

You just reminded me that my step sister posted on facebook about how she was a mermaid because her thighs touched. I forgot I was going to post about that lore at just the right amount of time after. Thanks!

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[–] Clearly_Satanic 0 points 13 points (+13|-0) ago 

Former friend used to be skinny but then we both ballooned up. I lost the weight but friend stayed a fat fuck. Fat fuck "friend" spread several rumors about me such as: I was bulimic/anorexic (classic), I used drugs to lose weight, I was now a stuck up bitch because I was skinny, I was a slut (this coming from a girl that fucked most of the goth scene), I was a tease, etc.

I didn't use drugs or ED to lose weight, I'm happily married, I don't flirt with other people (see: happily married) and as for me being stuck up, I got tired of her complaining about how hard it was for her to lose weight while she's eating a tub of Nutella to herself. A TUB OF NUTELLA!

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[–] Doctor_Mathematics 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

Notice how when whales are waling they're usually eating something too. They complain about not being able to lose weight while simultaneously doing the one thing that will make them gain weight.

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[–] MuscleMouse 0 points 13 points (+13|-0) ago 

My grandfather refused to teach my cousin our family's business because his fingers were too fat (the rest of him was/is also too fat). It's hilarious that every time I see my cousin, he tells me he could do just as well as I have/do, yet he can't even hold his tools with a steady hand.

[–] [deleted] 0 points 19 points (+19|-0) ago 

[Deleted]

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[–] MuscleMouse 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

I love when it comes from a family member.

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[–] Eunideen [S] 0 points 10 points (+10|-0) ago 

Haha, this reminds me of a story I saw a while ago about a fat jewler who got fired after breaking tons of diamond and precious jewels just to make a simple ring. He even broke a very expensive pink diamond and then got fired for being a fat fuck who can't do anything right.

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[–] ginger-saurus-rex 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

Is it jewelry or something like that that requires dextrous fingers and a hell of a lot of skill?

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[–] MuscleMouse 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

That and watchmaking.

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[–] Strikingearth 0 points 9 points (+9|-0) ago  (edited ago)

Got fired from a job because I was too muscular. This is what made me into a shitlord.

We were issued uniforms soon after starting my new job. The shirts were polos with the company logo and khaki pants. The sleeves of the polo shirts would frequently ride up and sit on the nape between my biceps and deltoids. This led to having the appearance of rolled up sleeves as if I were trying to show off my arms. I spoke to the owners about getting different sizes, but the medium was the best we could do. The larges looked like a trash bag, and the mediums fit me like cling wrap.

The GM was about 5'7 and 370-400lbs. She liked to wheel around the office in her chair because she was too lazy to walk. She'd pull herself around with her legs like Fred flintsone. One day, our office was outiftted with servers and computers for a call center. The IT people had cords running out of the server room and fastened to the floor with duck tape. Lo and behold, Europa was coming to scold me for "trying to look like a tough guy," by having my sleeves rolled up. She rolled her chair over the cords and broke several of them. When the owners confronted her about it, she tried to blame me by claiming that if I had been wearing the uniform properly then she would never have needed to reprimand me. Thus I should pay for the cables to be replaced.

The owners decided that this was a bullshit excuse and made her pay for new cables. Ever since then, she had it out for me and frequently harassed me about my arms. She even started to make sure I was scheduled for fewer clients and made less money. I was doing some routine training in her office one day and sat in her chair to use the computer because my computer was being replaced by the IT people. Her chair broke as soon as she sat down on it after me, so she accused me of sabotaging it. This resulted in her writing me a counseling notice and suspending me for a week. I came back after 7 days and I wasn't scheduled.

I spoke to the owners who said they would investigate into the matter. I never heard back from them.

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[–] MuscleMouse 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

It's bad you were fired like that. You reminded me of a guy in my frat. He was 5'6", 28" waist, and had a 19" bicep. He had all of his shirts made bespoke, which was a bit more expensive than off-the-rack, but they looked great.

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