I'm already in a bad mood today, just some life shit getting to me. I don't work today, so I decided to spend it at the gym, doing some house work, gardening, knitting, anything to keep me occupied and burn off this jittery angry energy I have. So, I dropped my husband off at work then swung by the grocery store to get some necessities. I also decided to indulge and got an energy drink, hoping that it'll help me burn off some of this bad energy when I hit the gym later.
I walk into the grocery store and there's a cooler in the center of the walkway with some meat in it. I see an older fat woman looking at them, then looks up and she sees me coming. I ignore her because it's not an issue, I'm just gonna be walking by so whatever. She looks back at the meat, then chooses the EXACT moment I pass her to move along, literally crashing into my left side with her unwashed bulk. I reel a bit from the impact and this slovenly hagbag looks me up and down, curls her lip up and says begrudgingly "Oh, excuse me.", like an afterthought after she literally just nearly KNOCKED ME OVER. I thought about tripping her as she walked in front of me to move along her way, but I probably would have ended up beating her saggy several-chinned face into the floor, so I just moved on. I'll shower when I get home.
While shopping for a zero calorie energy drink with as few carbs as I can get (ketosis or bust), I hear people coming up on my left. It's a busy grocery store, this isn't anything new. While comparing two cans, I'm suddenly knocked off my balance AGAIN, getting hit yet again on my left side. I look up and this gigantic sheham has literally shoved me out of the way with her race car cart.
I wasn't knocked down, but was very obviously knocked so off balance that I stumbled and nearly dropped the cans I was holding. It was NOT subtle, my trip or the fact that she fucking hit me. Absolutely seething by now, I look up with no small amount of homicidal intent in my eyes to see this disgusting bitch ignoring me completely, shopping for one liter bottles of red-branded beetus with her equally gigantic beta husband and two screaming loin spawn in the race car. I said to her "Was that intentional?" with trembling rage very obvious in my voice, even to my own ears. She looks up, looks me up and down (I'm in workout clothes, showing off my cut calves, hipbones, collar bone, and sweet arms), shrugs and says "I guess." And that was it. I'm absolutely dumbfounded as I stand there and watch her argue with her beta about whether they got 9 or 10 bottles of Coke. "Can you even count?!" she berates him. "Do you need to go back to school and learn to count? Do I have to do EVERYTHING?!" She moves between her cart and the drink display and continues loading up drinks, moving closer and closer to me, apparently trying to shove me out of the way again with her disgusting bulbous body. I just dropped my basket and the drinks and fucking left, shaking and wanting to scream.
I have NEVER had this sort of shit happen to me before, let alone have it happen twice in the span of like 15 minutes. What the actual fuck is wrong with fat people? Like, I honestly can't wrap my brain around how they function. In what way, in what world, is that kinda shit EVER okay? They're an entirely different species, I tell you, with some severe mental and social handicaps.
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[–] drakesdoom 0 points 44 points 44 points (+44|-0) ago
You should have called the police, she just admitted to minor assault and it's on camera.
[–] okporpoise 0 points 12 points 12 points (+12|-0) ago
Definitely. Not doing anything about their obscene behavior enables them to keep being a shitter.
[–] retailslave 0 points 2 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago
Fats get away with shit FAR too often. Maybe normal humans are intimidated by their ungodly size, but we need to remember just how weak, unstable, and uncoordinated fat fucks are. One stiff kick to the back of the knee and their bulbous forms come tumbling down. They lack any physical ability to stop it.
[–] [deleted] 0 points 4 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago (edited ago)
[–] LottaBeetusJuice 0 points 4 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago
Would avoid that. As much as it would be justified, they have cameras there and it's not worth getting into serious trouble because of an eatbeast.
[–] [deleted] 0 points 27 points 27 points (+27|-0) ago
[–] Lilina ago
Might as well kill the hams naming the reason as they want to cripple me and ruin my life.
[–] LetTheAshesFly 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
Yeah, one almost hit me (again) a couple months back, and had the nerve to look me in the eye when they halted to a stop (in the middle of a cross walk with the walk sign on) and call me a "stupid bitch"... For crossing the fucking road. I don't see why their behavior is acceptable when they are legit putting lives at risk, not just their own. I'm already extremely paranoid about cars from it happening before a few times, one actually hitting me (in a parking lot so I was only bruised).
[–] OhTheHamanatee 0 points 14 points 14 points (+14|-0) ago
Don't worry, beetus gets them all sooner or later, and that butter inhaler will suffer quite a lot of pain too.
You just make the best out of this disgusting situation now, and be proud that you triggered a mayoplanet by just existing.
[–] sugarcoatedstrych9 [S] 0 points 10 points 10 points (+10|-0) ago
That's the silver lining I'm taking away from this, even though I wasn't able to verbally respond or even get the proper authorities involved in the moment, knowing that I triggered TWO fat ugly wastes of space in the span of like 15 minutes just by my simple existence gives me no small amount of joy.
[–] DE4THWI5H 0 points 6 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago
Triggering a ham by existing is common. Triggering them so hard they literally ram you with shopping carts, you must be something special.
[–] DessertFox 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago (edited ago)
You can call the store and tell the manager that you were assaulted by a customer there. You could file a police report, but it will get ignored unless you have some sort of injury that would necessitate further action.
The best asshole move may be to take their cart the moment they let go of it, and walk it to the other side of the store. Force them to either waddle after it, or to get all the stuff again. It's not stealing, because they have not bought anything. You can tell them "if you're going to assault me with a cart, then you can't have a cart" the entire time if they reeeee after you.
[–] smoledman 0 points 4 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago (edited ago)
Lord Beetus always collects. 😈
In his case, limbs, eyes....
[–] ranch-othelioma 0 points 5 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago
Hamen.
[–] hulkingmanbeast ago
"And all the tithe of diabetes, whether of the legs of the lards, or of the yeast of the gunt, is Lord Beetus'."
[–] [deleted] 0 points 10 points 10 points (+10|-0) ago (edited ago)
[–] sugarcoatedstrych9 [S] 0 points 7 points 7 points (+7|-0) ago
I was so angry today that if I had responded any further, it would have been an absolute embarrassment of a scene, and I can't guarantee that I'd have come out on top. If I hadn't been in such an awful mood already, I probably would have been able to respond properly. It was either walk away, or get arrested myself for assault at the least, or murder at worst.
[–] Fllmia 1 point 7 points 8 points (+8|-1) ago (edited ago)
Don't let shit like this stand. I had a similar incident when checking out what will be my new local grocery in Minnesota a month ago. This fucking lardbarge shouldered past me in an aisle while I'm down on my heels checking for low-carb wrap brands I like. The beast is half my height, but easily triple my weight and knocks me off balance.
You need to realize, I'm from fucking Miami. It isn't something I'm saying because I'm proud, it's because Miami is the rudest most confrontational city in this country. I don't put up with this shit and can give as good as I get.
I looked at the ham and said, loudly and very rudely, "Excuse yourself". The ham looked back and said "What?"
"I said excuse yourself."
It mooed back, angry now, "For what?"
"For being a rude fucking bitch, what do you think? You just shoved me."
It was getting pissed now, "You were in my way, you have problems."
"Yes, I definitely have problems, your fucking rudeness chief among them. You owe me an apology. You ask people to move out of the way, you don't shove them, you rude fucking bitch"
It tried to leave, I followed it until I found an employee and told him what she had done, she kept mooing I had "problems" and "anger issues".
Damn fucking straight. Next time don't pick a fight. I wish I could say the employee kicked her out, but he did tell her to be more polite. She looked pretty freaked something more would happen, or that I was unhinged, which was kind of what I was going for.
Lesson - scare the FUCK out of hams with anger when they give you an excuse.
[–] ElectricPurple 0 points 7 points 7 points (+7|-0) ago
Shove it on the floor. It won't be able to get up, anyway.
[–] neveragainfatty 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
Yeah, but people around your size need to remember the physics behind the "Gunt Punt" or risk collateral damage. A falling obeast could possibly trap you underneath it. A fate worse than death.
[–] Lilina 0 points 2 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago
Or at least a smell as bad as death incarnate.
[–] Unsung_Heroes_again 0 points 5 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago
Would have snapped at "i guess"
[–] sizedouttaZero 0 points 3 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago (edited ago)
I hate the stories where shitlords/ladies dont give fats a taste of their own medicine. Fats deserve to be beat down back into their place whenever they step out of line, or else they think they can get away with both being an eyesore AND a public nuisance.
If violence isn't your thing, (which it honestly shouldn't be unless it's a dire situation), police reports should be. Don't let fats get away with anything.
edit because I still cannot English.
[–] sugarcoatedstrych9 [S] 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
It was almost just a fight or flight response, and I chose flight this time. She also did have young kids with her, so to get into a screaming match in front of those kids would have made me feel like an absolute piece of shit. Even though this bitch totally deserved it, the kids saw everything as they were sitting in the car part of the cart, and maybe they'd have learned something from the confrontation, I don't think I could have been the better adult, the higher person, in that situation knowing how I felt at the time and what I would have been capable of at the time.
But I'm getting better at confrontation in general. I'm still not that good at it, and I do try to pick my battles. This should have been one, yes, but again, flight just took over and I just bailed. It won't be happening again, this was the final straw in my patience.
[–] sizedouttaZero 0 points 3 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago
I understand where you're coming from, but sometimes (especially when dealing with obeasts) trying to be a decent human being is seen as weakness.
You have the patience of a saint, however.