I never really got why people called Starbucks "Starbeetus" on here but today I found out the hard way how it earned that name.
I'm waiting for my drink, a venti iced coffee - no cream, no syrup, no sugar. When all of a sudden, I hear some ruckus where you pick up your drinks.
It's two female hams. Guts almost hanging down to their knees, covered in cellulite, skin greasy with that weird sheen fats always have. One is doing that weird fat people arm cross pose and the loud one in the front is screeching at the barista making their drinks. They're pissed at the barista because they can't find the sugar packets and "ain't drinking that Splenda bullcrap".
They both ordered two caramel frappucinos (EACH) dripping in caramel sauce with extra extra whipped cream. Why the hell would they need more sugar? The barista is getting frustrated and just hands them like 30 sugar packets in the back so they can leave and stop taking up all the space in the shop. Before they left, I saw them dump like 10 sugars in their ALREADY VERY SWEET coffee-milkshakes. My stomach churned.
How is it legal to turn coffee into an abomination like that? Fats have to ruin everything.
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[–] tableflipper 0 points 14 points 14 points (+14|-0) ago (edited ago)
I hate coffee because it's too bitter for me. That's why, instead of adding incomprehensible amounts of sugar to it, I DON'T FUCKING DRINK IT and drink tea instead.
[–] Cenki 0 points 4 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago
I like to add a few ounces of skim milk. Little brotien in that after all :D Also I like floral brews places hands over crotch
[–] Bobsentme 0 points 2 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago
You can have my coffee when you take it from my cold, dead hands.
Or, you know, I run out of sweet and low packets.
[–] DayShaun 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
If you find regular coffee bitter, I would recommend giving cold brew a try if you have a good coffee shop near you. You may find that it's more pleasant and doesn't carry the bitterness that some low end coffees brewed in hot water can.
[–] 5968392? ago (edited ago)
Feel the same way about coffee, not a huge fan. I only drink it in the winter to warm myself up and I have to buy the expensive stuff, grind it myself, and then add a good bit of Splenda and almond milk to it before I can actually enjoy it. My husband introduced me to amino acid with caffeine in it because I need my caffeine and had resorted to getting it from diet soda. I am just not a morning person and with this stuff I seriously doubt I will touch coffee this winter (guess it depends on how cold it gets).
[–] Unsung_Heroes_again 0 points 6 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago
Pfft just try a white chocolate mocha plain... that thing is the blood of lord beetus.
[–] [deleted] 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
[–] HamShanky ago
It is just so sweet it is sickening. It's the same of how I have been put off of sour keys since the age of 10
[–] Candid 1 point 5 points 6 points (+6|-1) ago
You're wrong.
Once upon a time, in a dimension far, far away...
Something similar to what you observed happened with larger organisisms. The consumed beverage caused them to reach critical mass and collapse into a blackhole.
This is all we have left.
[–] DayShaun 0 points 5 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago
It's mystifying. You couldn't even taste the coffee at that point. Wouldn't it be cheaper to just put ice and sugar in a blender? I suppose that involves work, and fats just don't do that..
[–] DelusionalHominids 0 points 5 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago
Maybe the caffeine counteracts the coma they'd ordinarily go into after dumping that much pure sugar into their blood.
[–] 5966099? 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago (edited ago)
The frappaccinos (sp?) are made with "coffee-flavored syrup" and a tiny amount of espresso powder so there really isn't much caffeine to begin with. I used to work at a Starbucks.
[–] hypercat 0 points 3 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago
The only thing I have ever ordered there is the tazo passion tea unsweetened because it has 50 cent refills and no sugar and about 10 calories.
[–] Unsung_Heroes_again 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
Actually.. thats the only "tea" I keep stocked at home... it's delicious! Both at home and while hiking!
[–] Carsandsarcasm 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
Their poor taste buds must have been beaten well into submission to want that much sugar.
[–] angriff 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
I've never heard of anyone adding sugar to a frappucino. That's the most ridiculous sweets thing I've ever heard. They are already sickly sweet (at least as I recall, I haven't tasted one in years).
[–] DayShaun 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
I heard of a horror story of a deathfat adding like 10 sugar packets to southern sweet tea!!
[–] blue5car 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
Would you like some tea with your sugar ma'am.
Ma'am. Triggered.
[–] 5966174? ago (edited ago)
You've never worked in a coffee shop, I see.
The things people do with sugar...the horror...the horror...
[–] [deleted] 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
[–] DelusionalHominids 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
Maybe the syrup is just blood harvested from super deathfats.
[–] retailslave ago
Nah. It would be chewier.