Okay, so this one is for the idiots who believe that their weight only affects themselves… I work in a funeral home. When the planetary beings go supernova, guess who gets to try to lug their fatasses around? Any guesses yet? Yup, your local funerary staff. We get the pleasure of trying to get them from where they decided to check out, to the funeral home, then embalming table (let's not even mention the struggles to properly embalm a butter golem), then the dressing table and finally into a casket (at least, that's the process where I am). In my story here the latter two steps where the trickiest. I had a beast about 400 or so pounds, already embalmed and stiff, I had to devise a way to get this massive glutton into the clothes the family brought in. Now I usually consider myself to be a strong lady but, I had to employ the assistance of 2 other people just to get him dressed and then placed into the casket, which of course was oversized and difficult to maneuver through the funeral home to the viewing room.
When the eatbeast passes, their weight affects those in the funeral service industry and our ability to efficiently take care of them, especially without help (using more resources) and causing many injuries, yes we do have things called lifts and yes it was used in this instance, but in a small and old funeral home, you get nothing fancy (but not intended to be used to dress a body, which we had to do), and yes I did still manage to slightly hurt my back (don't posses the greatest spine anyway) even with employing all of the assistance I could.
Now to bring this novella home, fast forward to the family coming in to check to make sure everything is satisfactory, what I assume was the mother (I didn't meet with the family originally), moon sized herself, of course wants to know if snacks will be provided during visitation (asking under the guise that her local funeral home provides them and is just curious if we do the same) :/ of course there will be.
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[–] Gonesugartitsup 0 points 5 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago
Who in the fuck eats shit whilst she's viewing a dead corpse in a funeral home? Snacks?!? Is this new? I've never heard of such fuckery!
[–] The_Mad_Catter13 [S] 0 points 3 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago
This is not new to me, every funeral home I have worked/been to would have some sort of refreshments for the family and friends during a viewing, usually coffee, water and something along the lines of cookies. Though food is always the last thing on my mind when visiting the dearly departed.
[–] iammeandyouareme ago
My uncle brought snacks (cookies, cheese curds, brownies) to my grandma's viewing last year. He's a large man, so that's part of it, but also because my grandma was the kind of person who made sure there were ALWAYS snacks.
Frankly, after how my bitch aunt acted to my sister and I, grabbing a cookie in another room away from her was a welcome distraction from the awkwardness of the day.
[–] [deleted] 0 points 2 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago
[–] burn_montag 0 points 3 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago
Well until they get so fat that they burn the building to the ground during their cremation
[–] Unsung_Heroes_again 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
They never think about the grease fires.
[–] The_Mad_Catter13 [S] 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
Normally, I would want a person to choose embalming (it's my favorite part of this business) but when it comes to the obese... yes cremation please!
[–] BuzzingBeaver 0 points 2 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago
Ever had a family bring clothes that were too small? Fats always underestimate their size.
[–] The_Mad_Catter13 [S] 0 points 5 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago
Yes, scissors are a wonderful thing. :p
[–] christy 0 points 2 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago
Out of curiosity... do you charge more for fat people? Not just for the coffin, but I mean the overall cost has to be more, from labor, to holes in the ground.
[–] The_Mad_Catter13 [S] 0 points 3 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago (edited ago)
Well yes and no, the casket costs more, and so does the vault/concrete box, the plot costs depend on the cemetery, but I assume that it would cost more as well simply due to space. Everything else is pretty much the same cost as for other people, at least at my funeral home. The other items vary from funeral home to funeral home. Labor goes up if more people are required to stop their duties to help because it puts them behind.
[–] EnvyOfFatties ago
You should chop the legs off and throw them in a crematorium. It'll make the bodies lighter and noone will know because most of the time if there's a wake only the front half is open