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I'm torn on how to form an opinion on my girlfriend's family. We've been dating for the going on 2 years now, and it seems like the only person who can say something nice about me is her dad. He's a very well-educated older man, former military, and has a very successful career as a surgeon. Her mom has been a stay at home mom for the better part of 2 or 3 decades, and her siblings are either lawyers or in the medical field. Consistently, her mother has talked down upon me, called me a Godless man, called me family white trash, and my brother a rapist. Of course, she'll never say it to my face and accuse me of making it all up if I confront her about it. Her brothers aren't much better.
I firmly believe that this is because I come from a very poor family (dad was a construction worker/owner, and mom works at our local school board), and that they believe that my girlfriend could do much better with someone else, such as one of her dad's surgeon colleagues. I'm currently going to school for cyber security and have a successful military career myself, which is why I believe her dad and I get along as tentatively as we do.
Naturally, this puts a strain on our relationship, as she desires to be with someone that will be successful, but also someone that will be well-like by her family. Her siblings are all about 15 years older than her (she's adopted), so I feel like their metrics for success is very skewed, as they seem to believe that I should be where her siblings are right now
[–]21133206?[S]0 points
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That's a tough situation you're in but I do have some questions. How are you learning about this information? Is your girlfriend telling you what her mother and siblings have said? Tell me how you've learned about their feelings and the comments they've made- it's an important componant to your problem.
[+]Sparky1590 points0 points0 points
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[–]Sparky1590 points
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My girlfriend has told me about their feelings, but I initially blew it off because I believe that everyone corrupts information, especially when it's as emotionally-charged as a comment about someone's S/O. However, on one instance, my girlfriend actually recorded the conversation between her and her family (my state is a one-party state), and that is how I came to discover how they really feel about me
Granted, I do believe that my girlfriend has a part to play in all of this, but even her ignorance to the possible outcomes is no excuse for the things that her family has said about me
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[–] Sparky159 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
I'm torn on how to form an opinion on my girlfriend's family. We've been dating for the going on 2 years now, and it seems like the only person who can say something nice about me is her dad. He's a very well-educated older man, former military, and has a very successful career as a surgeon. Her mom has been a stay at home mom for the better part of 2 or 3 decades, and her siblings are either lawyers or in the medical field. Consistently, her mother has talked down upon me, called me a Godless man, called me family white trash, and my brother a rapist. Of course, she'll never say it to my face and accuse me of making it all up if I confront her about it. Her brothers aren't much better.
I firmly believe that this is because I come from a very poor family (dad was a construction worker/owner, and mom works at our local school board), and that they believe that my girlfriend could do much better with someone else, such as one of her dad's surgeon colleagues. I'm currently going to school for cyber security and have a successful military career myself, which is why I believe her dad and I get along as tentatively as we do.
Naturally, this puts a strain on our relationship, as she desires to be with someone that will be successful, but also someone that will be well-like by her family. Her siblings are all about 15 years older than her (she's adopted), so I feel like their metrics for success is very skewed, as they seem to believe that I should be where her siblings are right now
@Empress, what do you believe I should do?
[–] 21133206? [S] ago
That's a tough situation you're in but I do have some questions. How are you learning about this information? Is your girlfriend telling you what her mother and siblings have said? Tell me how you've learned about their feelings and the comments they've made- it's an important componant to your problem.
@Sparky159
[–] Sparky159 ago (edited ago)
My girlfriend has told me about their feelings, but I initially blew it off because I believe that everyone corrupts information, especially when it's as emotionally-charged as a comment about someone's S/O. However, on one instance, my girlfriend actually recorded the conversation between her and her family (my state is a one-party state), and that is how I came to discover how they really feel about me
Granted, I do believe that my girlfriend has a part to play in all of this, but even her ignorance to the possible outcomes is no excuse for the things that her family has said about me
@Empress