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[–] 14006129? 0 points 9 points (+9|-0) ago 

When I took time alone I focused on physical fitness, learning to cook a wider variety of meals, dealt with personality problems that had strained previous relationships, and read lots in Fascinating Womanhood and Getting to I Do. I mainly learned how to be alone gracefully.

I made a list of everything I'd ever said "I've always wanted to do/try that" about, and then started ticking things off the list. It turns out I don't like driving a motorcycle, and I'm glad I took the classes -- now I don't ever have to say "I've always wanted to get my motorcycle license" again. Things ranged from tiny to huge:

  • Get motorcycle license
  • Take sailing course
  • Go apple picking
  • Compete in powerlifting
  • Get a library card
  • Learn to sew, and make a dress ( I actually just accomplished this yesterday)
  • Have a houseplant
  • Learn to make gluten free cornbread from scratch
  • Travel to a new city alone

Some of these activities grew into new hobbies, some were one-and-done. But undertaking this project made me a more interesting and fulfilled woman. I met my fiance just shy of a year of being single -- I wasn't looking for a new relationship, but I was definitely in a sane space for one.

Best of luck!

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[–] callthehambulance [S] 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

"I wasn't looking for a new relationship, but I was definitely in a sane space for one."

That's the point I'm looking to get to. And I love what you say about being alone gracefully. That really struck a chord with me.As does your observation about dealing with personality issues which had strained previous relationships. That's some great advice there, so thank you for the insight and taking time to reply.

Also, congratulations on the engagement and so many warm wishes for a long and happy life together to you both!

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[–] 14033049? 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

Hey, thank you! Best of luck. Self-improvement is always worth it.