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[–] AmaleksHairyAss 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago  (edited ago)

It's not ungentlemanly to smile and offer a warm greeting. Being aloof isn't good manners. Neither is using words and mannerisms that may make the other person uncomfortable. I tend to make people feel awkward with my excessive formality. It's a bad habit I'm trying to curb.

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[–] zen_music [S] 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

Well hey, I've been watching old Dean Martin Shows on Youtube lately, (like the songs) - Dean is a textbook of how to be smooth and cool. Probably more than you'd want, but a great example of all the way out there. (I'm told he never drank except wine at dinner...it was all apple juice. Sure: )

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[–] NeedleStack 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

I respect the reason why men walk closest to traffic but my boyfriend and I do things a little differently. No matter which direction we're walking, I walk on the right-hand side of the sidewalk. He walks on my left.

This is because there are so many rude people who have bumped, pushed, or brushed too closely past me (I guess because I'm so much smaller than them). It's savagery. So I now walk on the right and he walks on my left and is thus pretty much in the middle of the sidewalk and is closest to everyone walking in the opposite direction. No one bumps into him and I'm free to be unaccosted.

This means that half the time shops are on my right, other times the traffic is on my right but that's fine with me!

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[–] zen_music [S] 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

Well, that's an interesting evolution! Thank you. I was told as a child that in earlier times, when there were either no paved roads or in any case the streets were dirty with horse manure, the man would walk on the outside to intercept any mud or misery from the street. I suspect back then, being jostled from the inside lane of the sidewalk would have been a lesser problem. But if this is the modern way for your life to be supported, and for equanimity and respect to be preserved, then I'm all for it.

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[–] 16403065? 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

This is quite interesting, thank you for the tip on how to better treat people in my future!

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[–] gazillions 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

It's like a dance where one leads and one follows. Most women are quietly relieved when a man has the confidence to know the hows and whats of social behavior. It's reassuring.

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[–] drakesdoom2 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

When walking in a city with a women I always keep her in my left to keep my gun hand free. I will plan the side of the street to keep her on whatever side of the sidewalk seems safer. Also have her sling any purse or bags between and in front of you to make it harder for pick pockets.

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[–] hungir_strike 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

Using someone's name is a huge one. I meet a lot of people, and using someone's name affirms that they're important enough to remember. Physical contact is another good one. Handshakes are great, I am personally more of a hugger but context is important.

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[–] green_man 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

If it's understood that the man will be a gentleman, the women can fit seamlessly into the flow of things.

Topic.

all women love to be protected, cherished and appreciated

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stand up and shake hands. Always introduce him to whoever you're with.

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When you greet a friend, use his name.

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smooth navigation and affirming respect.

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Sir, you are simply full of good topics. I believe each and everyone of these are worthy of a topic.

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[–] zen_music [S] 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

I appreciate your comment, and thank you. I hope others will take these matters up...I've made a long lifetime of all this, but never had much chance to hear how other men see it. I just think of myself as happily old-fashioned.

With my lover, I have made the deal that I need things to be like this in order to feel comfortable with myself, and to allow my inner man to become the outer man. She seems very happy with it, and has never taken back her agreement...I'm thinking it suits her as well as it does me. Certainly it's a seamless dance of 'how to get things done', and really has little or nothing to do with feminism or female power. I have plenty of respect for her as a woman; this set of protocols is practical and useful, and makes us feel good. That's enough for me-

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[–] green_man 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

I apologize for the lack of clarity, you should post each and every one of those separately on this sub. They're great topics.