Might as well post some more stories here, huh?
One of my friends is dating a ham. I'm don't mean a hambeast, or a hamplanet, I'm talking a hamuniverse! I personally call him 4x4, 4 feet tall, 4 feet wide. I never saw 4x4 until recently, so I could only gauge his appearance based off of what evidence he left behind. Friend's passenger carseat was completely flattened, sloped down to one side, and had a few suspicious stains. The backseat of her car was littered with empty Monster energy drink cans. Whenever she wore his sweatshirts, they resembled parachutes, rather than a hoodie.
As their relationship progressed, Friend became more and more hammy. We have vending machines at our school, and before our morning (MORNING!!) classes, she would buy a Monster, and a Dr. Pepper. Every day, for the rest of the semester. Sometimes she would get snacks, usually Cheeots, or off brand cookies.
Friend began packing on the pounds, evident by her expanding fupa and muffin top. She actually complained about her weight once-
"I'm so fat, boo :("
Still, every day was started Monster, and Dr.Pepper. She did nothing to change her diet, and kept on complaining, eventually tossing in some classic fatlogic.
"I'm not fat, I'm fluffy! :3" or "God loves me so much he gave me extra padding uwu!"
Friend lost her neck, and grew a second chin, while her legs looked as if she broke into the krabby patty vault.
Friend's friends (I call them friend in laws), used to consist of a good group, all healthy, normal people with great senses of humor, and even better tastes in music. She abandoned these guys, and moved on to a new pod. Talking to these butter barges is like trying to talk to an eggplant. They have such a short attention span, are loud, smelly bitches, who have zero conversational skills. You can hear them coming from across the campus, they are that annoying (why do all fatties have to be so loud?)
I tried to talk to her about maybe cutting down on the sugar, but she didn't want to hear it. She even stopped drinking water because she """"doesn't like the taste""""".
I give! I give!
I hate to lose my friend to a fatty, but she obviously doesn't care. Her whale of a boyfriend controls who she can and can't have as a friend, insists on her being with him, rather than doing her own thing, and has turned her on to so many unhealthy choices, and she isn't even aware of it.