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[–] ThirteenthZodiac 0 points 84 points (+84|-0) ago 

Sigh.

I never wanted to be here. If you had told a younger version of myself that I would be posting to this kind of community, I would never have believed it. I would have said that I would never stop believing in equality, that the state of Africa was due to the colonialism of the past, that democracy would flourish and ST:TNG was what awaited the world.

Yet, here I am, in what most would consider a "hate sub" full of lies and vitriol, a den of degenerate racists.

My journey here has been a strange one. A few years ago, I discovered Karen Straughan on YouTube, and what I heard from her opened my eyes to the world. What began as trying to understand my past failed relationships with women gradually became something more: I began more closely examining everything I believed, everything I had been taught. With a B.A. in Philosophy, I've been well-trained in disassembling arguments and getting to their cores, but - for some reason - had never really applied these skills on myself.

And when I did, well... suffice to say that everything changed.

One by one, my old beliefs fell by the wayside, replaced by rusty, misshapen thoughts. The tenets of feminism had been excised from my brain, but there was so much more. A link at TRP on Reddit led me to Mencius Moldbug, and in his writings I - once again - found truth, a truth that so few seemed willing to talk about openly. My distaste for democracy - I used to be an anarchist - and the recent deconstruction of my views on gender led me to deconstruct my political views, as well, and thus I was reborn a reactionary. A monarchist, to be more precise.

I would have called myself crazy, if I knew as a teenager what I had become. An anarchist becoming a monarchist? How absurd! And yet these changes seemed rational to me. I could argue for these positions in public, with my peers, and though most would think that I'm out of touch, I don't think they are of the belief that I have dangerous beliefs. That one was still coming...

The race riots bothered me. I'd known of riots in the past - my grandparents live in Cincinnati, where race riots happen from time to time, or so I'm told - but I hadn't really contemplated them before. Somehow or another, I found my way to CT on Reddit, and began reading.

At first, I hated myself for it. Here I was, reading racist propaganda! How revolting! Yet, as a philosopher, I knew that I had to understand your positions: if nothing else, it would improve my understanding of my own. Propelled by hatred of SJWs (who I utterly despise), I forged on, figuring that if they hated something, there was most likely a kernel of truth to it.

The statistics were what did it for me, in the end. The statistics and my utter hatred of Marxism: when I was an anarchist, I understood Marxism to be my polar opposite, ideologically speaking, and thus have never had any love for it. The combination of "social Marxism" being the driving force behind "multiculturalism," the statistics that do not lie (I also studied Finance and Economics for a bit)... in addition, my studies in Psychology had led me to accept evolutionary psych, and that - combined with lessons gleaned from TRP - had led me to acknowledge that evolution would necessarily lead to differentiation in other ways, as well.

I already had some doubts regarding the "established" (read: politically correct) notion that there are no real differences between races: when I took Anatomy & Physiology, I was quickly silenced when I pointed out that race does matter, as blacks can get Sickle Cell Anemia, while whites cannot. That this notion was unacceptable in a human biology class, specifically intended for nursing students, confounded me - we know there are differences, and while it's genetic, that doesn't change the fact that there are differences! We were sacrificing scientific rigor in the name of political correctness, and that "rustled my jimmies," as it were.

Today, it is apparent to me that there is some difference. I don't know precisely what they are, and I'm not (quite) willing to say that blacks are "subhuman" or anything like that. But I look at Africa, and I see... a continent that has not culturally evolved in any way, shape, or form. I see no great works of art, no scholastic pursuits, no scientific achievement. Combine that observation with the oddly stunted cultural growth of black communities here in the US, and then the recent madness both here with our riots and abroad in Europe, with the sudden dramatic increase in criminal activity that correlates all too well with the sudden influx of black immigrants... correlation may not be causation, but if it quacks like a duck...

My every attempt to disprove your statistics and observations has been met with failure; in philosophy, that means that I must, at least for the time being, accept your position as truth.

So, here I am.

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[–] IsmellniggerV2 0 points 33 points (+33|-0) ago 

Excellent post. Upnigger for you.

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[–] Okonkwood 0 points 22 points (+22|-0) ago 

Now now, use "upgroid", he sounds like a tender soul for whom "nigger" might be grating :)

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[–] Pabmx_Gtmbhgtsblm88 0 points 8 points (+8|-0) ago 

Upniggers for all!

[–] [deleted] 0 points 22 points (+22|-0) ago 

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[–] ThirteenthZodiac 0 points 32 points (+32|-0) ago 

I would honestly breathe a sigh of relief if I could. Truth is often an ugly thing, and I've found that most don't have the stomach for it. My education has made me... significantly more malleable, in some ways, while harder to sway in others. I require cold, calculated logic, rather than appeals to emotion, for me to adjust my position on a topic, but I am willing to adjust it on anything, even those values core to who I consider myself to be. I do not consider myself a "flip-flopper," merely a mortal man who has not learned everything and who wants his position to match his understanding of reality.

But from where I'm sitting, what I've looked at and thought about - thus far, you folks seem to have the right of it. It also doesn't help that there is a very apparent bias in society against white folk, something that - ironically - the BLM movement has made me keenly more aware of, as well as the things going on in Europe.

Rome, I fear, is burning, and I would much rather live my life knowing full well that it's ablaze despite my inability to do anything about it, rather than burn in ignorance.

[–] [deleted] 0 points 8 points (+8|-0) ago  (edited ago)

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[–] ThirteenthZodiac 0 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago 

I think soaking in the culture and history of those who came before us, from our ancestral homelands, is awesome, but obviously I didn't do any of that.

This is one thing that started irking me about the social justice agenda some time ago, long before I first visited CT on reddit: the whole "white people have no culture" meme. Have these people never heard of Beethoven, da Vinci, Leibniz, Byron? The West has literal millenia of diverse cultural heritage. Europe may be a relatively small place, but the cultural output alone - not even talking about technological achievement! - is absolutely astounding. How anyone can look at that and claim that white people have no culture is beyond me. My best guess would be that because America is seen as a "melting pot," where we all kind of meld together, we lost the strong cultural identities Europeans had (and perhaps still have; not being European, I can't say), and now we have this weird, conglomerate mess that is a murky brown to the rainbow of colors that was Europe.

The negativity and darkness you feel about having come to "the dark side" speaks less to some moral failing of yours, and more toward the untruth which has been reified in our world.

It is a constant, nagging doubt; as much of a cliche as it is and has become, these new ideas really are a red pill. The desire to return to the comfort of ignorance is, I think, something that I - and perhaps everyone here, and all those who participate in the greater reactionary movement of our day - feel any time my thoughts stray from what I know the majority thinks.

My only regret is that I feel powerless about it, and that - I think - is why that niggling doubt remains. Were I able to do something about these newfound beliefs, were there a Rubicon to cross and someone to follow across it: I think the doubts would subside, and the truth of our ideology would be bore out in the success or failure of such an endeavor. But for now, all we can do is voice our grievances in secret and amongst each other, lest we be shunned from greater society.

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[–] Okonkwood 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

See, I've had a total inversion in my thoughts about the statement "how can you take pride in being white, anything your ancestors did you did not do personally, so you're trying to take credit for someone else's work...you must be insecure."

As with most things related to SJWs, I think this is another case where they appear modest, but in fact are way more egotistical than their opponents. Which is more egotistical, to imagine one is a fully self-made man, beholden to no-one and nothing, or to believe that one is just a vessel of one's ancestors' genes, tasked with upholding and continuing their legacy through righteous behavior, the choice of a good partner, and the creation of healthy, robust children? I would say the former is far more egotistical.

The fact is, while personal behavior is important, the entire template of who each of us can become is laid out in our genes. All our moods, all our desires, all our ambition or lack thereof, comes from genes. Of course, we can choose to realize this potential or not, we can be damaged by parenting or life events, we can even push ourselves beyond our limits. But to imagine we are all blank slates, or self-made men...no. Any self-made man who arose from poverty should not slap himself on the back too heartily, for (luck aside), the tenacity and smarts which enabled him to overcome challenges were stamped in every fiber of his being from birth.

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[–] SorbusAnglica 0 points 8 points (+8|-0) ago 

Great post, any community needs intelligent and well read people but I think the Chimpire/Niggers/Coontown especially. I say that because I consider the community to be more than just complaining about niggers but as part of the wider movement for a White/European identity (not exclusively). By highlighting differences we are de facto creating a more racially polarised/segregated society. Good, I say. I guess that makes me biased but the way I've read NRx and the dark enlightenment is that might does make right, winners do write history and it's perfectly ok to be ethnocentric.

The guys at therightstuff.biz are the best example of practical alt-right politics. They have a coherent narrative and are not beholden to the same spock-like logical traps libertarians and an-caps find themselves in. They recognise the issue should be dealt on a practical biological basis (sex, race) and not on an abstract set of rules. I had the same path as you; it was /r/theredpill and sexual awareness that did it for me. Darwinism is a coherent (and demonstrable) narrative and is much better suited to explain sex than feminism (particularly 2nd and 3rd wave marxist infused). With that pill popped you can approach society. The biggest crime of the (primarily Jewish) post WW2 academics has been the denial of Darwinism.

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[–] ThirteenthZodiac 0 points 10 points (+10|-0) ago 

There is still a part of my mind that cringes when I talk about having a "white identity;" it's been so ingrained into everything about our society that being white is some kind of... moral failing, that that bit of indoctrination is difficult to root out. I did nothing to "earn" the fact that I'm white, so I find it a bit ridiculous to take pride in it. I also find it a bit absurd to take pride in what folk of my ethnicity did in the past; sure, Europeans did some awesome things, but I had no hand in it. I can carry on the legacy, I suppose, by following in the footsteps of those who came before, but that's not really limited to just white folk. The torch of human progress isn't reserved for any one person or group of any sort of identity; it's there for all of us, to take and carry forward in our own ways. Just seems that some are... less interested, culturally, and less able, genetically.

That said, I definitely understand the push for a national identity in European nations. The invasion of refugees is going to destroy the whole continent, and with Putin looming large, we cannot have chaos in Europe. I don't see why the rest of the world has to deal with the fallout from the madness in Africa and the Middle East. I don't care if we (as in the West, as a whole) meddled decades ago; southeast Asia (Best Korea aside) seems to be doing perfectly well. And if things went to hell post-colonialism... then why did we stop colonialism? If subjugating the locals and enforcing a Western style of government is what it takes to get them to stop killing each other, then maybe we should do that. I'm not talking about slavery - I think we've come a bit further than that - but clearly someone needs to be in charge, and Europeans have demonstrated in the past that they're pretty good at people and land management.

I think that my movement from being a libertarian/anarcho-capitalist to... anything else, really, was inevitable, provided I paid any attention to society and the world at large. It's one thing to have pie-in-the-sky dreams of perfect societies at a young age, but at some point, you have to realize that there are problems in the now that need solutions, and having some vague notions of a utopia that could come to pass under super-ideal conditions just doesn't cut it. You have to be more realistic, more grounded, and find practical solutions that work now, and hope that you have the wisdom and foresight to set them up in such a way that they will continue to work for any reasonable amount of time.