Title edit: 100 day commitment
I meditate, but I don't have a schedule. I'm too lazy to put a timer on, and I just decide to meditate until x happens. Somedays I don't even do that. Some days I find myself feeling unbearably sad, but I don't have the mental fortitude to face it or even find out what it is, and instead I drown myself in media. I don't even know what day of my hundred days I am on anymore.
What I need is insight meditation, but I'm making such little leeway into the concentration/shamatha parts of the exercise that insight seems to me ways off.
I also need a meditation partner. Someone I can contact every day about my commitment, to keep my motivated.