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[–] RevDrStrangelove 0 points 29 points (+29|-0) ago 

That dude has the right idea. I hope he sticks to his guns and doesn't cuck out.

His expectations parallel mine.

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[–] IGiveZeroFucks [S] 0 points 22 points (+22|-0) ago  (edited ago)

It's scary that we live in a time when simply wanting to have your wife take your name and be faithful to you is considered a deal breaker for some women.

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[–] clubberlang 0 points 8 points (+8|-0) ago 

Bullet dodged bank account intact

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[–] Maroonsaint 0 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago 

I love the comments. Sexist men etc etc. lol. Let em be miserable

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[–] Alopix 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

I don't think mentally ill cunts are a recent phenomenon. There used to be correction(including physical,) social pressure and competition though, now society congratulates and actively rewards them for being fatter, nastier and sluttier

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[–] gazillions 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

There are 3 and a half million diagnosed schizophrenics in the US.

2 million are bi polar.

Personality disorders are un counted.

They love social media. They love Reddit. They love Twitter. They love Tumbler. They love Facebook.

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[–] ViperCarbz 0 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago 

This gem:

don't really ascribe to the notion that I should have to give up another piece of my identity just because I'm getting married.

Seems like the type of woman who expects the husband to give up his identity for her.

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[–] IGiveZeroFucks [S] 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

Here's another from her comment history:

Hello, I’ve lurked in this sub for a while, but this is the first time I’ve even thought of posting. I’m F/24 and somewhere around 260ish at 5’2”.

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[–] Grand_Wizard 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

She does. Further down in the comments section she explains that she is having him change his last name to hers.

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[–] Grand_Wizard 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

He does at first. Keep reading, way down in the comments section she explains that he surrenders. Basically he will now change his last name to hers.

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[–] Barn 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

in the comments she says that she earns more than him by a long shot. i think the man is trying to demand more respect from her than he deserves. in traditional marriages the man was the bread winner thats why they were head for the family and their decisions should be obeyed. not the case with these two

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[–] ethtirlomalral 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago  (edited ago)

My wife knew a few useless gashes in government who were earning $100k+ and didn’t deserve half that. She was never offered anything other than temp work. I’ve also never known self-absorbed semi-feminist roasties to do any job that requires hard work. She said he’s in engineering anyway. Traditional roles were irrelevant the moment women started driving wages down. Depending on what city you live in, one income is simply impossible to raise a family or even live on.

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[–] Samchay6 0 points 20 points (+20|-0) ago 

My mother didn't change her name either times she got married, as she said she had an identity professionally that was attached to her last name.

Never marry a woman that believes marriage is temporary.

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[–] IGiveZeroFucks [S] 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

Also never marry a woman who is 260 lbs.

Hello, I’ve lurked in this sub for a while, but this is the first time I’ve even thought of posting. I’m F/24 and somewhere around 260ish at 5’2”.

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[–] Samchay6 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

That's not a woman, that's a land manatee...

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[–] albatrosv15 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

Actually, there is a reason to not change a name or not to marry. It's when you are in a science world and everything is attached to your name. Fucked up, i know, but once you change the name, everyone will go "Huh, who are you? Get the fuck out of here".

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[–] SurfinMindWaves 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago  (edited ago)

Or men. The problem is they rarely admit that up front. You often only find out when it is too late.

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[–] Samchay6 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

Or men. The problem is they rarely admit that up front. You often only find out when it is too late.

Not really, your starting your argument based off a ridiculously false premise; that men have the luxury of viewing marriage the same way as women.

Damn near every man knows marriage has very different rules for men and women, and should the marriage end, the outcomes are egregiously dissimilar.

Almost every man knows that divorce will not likely work to their advantage. The last 40 years has shown that divorce almost always devastating for a man economically. Many boys grew up in the 70's, 80's, and 90's saw their parents, or their friends parents divorced; mom kept everything, while dad moved into a condo. Furthermore, divorce leaves a man in a difficult position to take care of his children; essentially dad become just a paycheck for mom that gets to see his kids once every two weeks. Finally, socially, the mom is relegated to a modern day semi-sainthood; the single mom, left to raise her children on her own (because that's what she demanded in family court), undoubtedly deserved of her martyr status. Sadly, many of these broken homes have perpetuated the main underlying problem in today's modern relationships; boys and girls are growing up with no template for what a family-based sustainable marriage looks like. I thank God for my parent's imperfect, yet sustainable marriage, otherwise I never would of found my wife. Even for me, it took years, and a couple of kids together to go through with it and say our vows.

No matter the actual reason for the divorce, in today's society, any woman can play the victim card. A woman can be physically, verbally, and emotionally abusive in a marriage without fear of social or legal repercussions. Let a man do raise his voice in an argument or even give harsh truth using strong language, and suddenly the man is "verbally abusive." Hurt a woman's feelings, now you're being "emotionally abusive." While most men would agree there should be definite lines for what is acceptable and unacceptable, there are no lines for women. In family court, there are rules for men, yet no rules for women, because whatever sociopathic behavior she manifested during the marriage is obviously the result of her emotional abuse. As we learned from #metoo, career-ending allegations don't require proof; listen and believe, right?

Consequently, most men are wary of marriage because today's commitment is a one way street. The saddest thing is, I think most men want a wife and most women want a husband. On both sides, however, we have produced emotionally damaged men and women who, as I've stated before, can't really tell what qualities to look for in a spouse. Even worse, many of these people lack the qualities needed for a long-term, sustainable relationship, much less a marriage. But as long as social accountability is only for men, marriage is an increasingly scary proposition to bet half your shit on...

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[–] SmegmaDownUnder 0 points 19 points (+19|-0) ago 

Just reading all the fucked up replies. It's clear that none of these people respect their significant other, or think that woman can deman respect and not earn it but if a man says he does not feel he is respected in a relationship then obviously he is sexist. I hope he leaves her and she dies alone eaten by her 40 cats

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[–] Barn 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

why should a woman obey her husband if she earns much more than he does, which is the case in this instance

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[–] AndrewBlazeIt 1 points 19 points (+20|-1) ago  (edited ago)

There's a very simple solution to this issue.

"You take my last name, or we're fucking done."

My mother didn't change her last name either time she got married

She's already proven herself of dubious marriageability.

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[–] IGiveZeroFucks [S] 0 points 10 points (+10|-0) ago 

I would have walked the second she hinted that she wouldn't take my name. She expects wife privledges while basically remaining a loose girlfriend in an open relationship.

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[–] CheeseboogersGhost 0 points 8 points (+8|-0) ago 

She wants to keep her "Goldstein" last name.

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[–] FormerBaltimoreRes 0 points 16 points (+16|-0) ago 

Look at the top posters going "you go girl", they all have fucked up lives if you read their post history.

substiccount says

I'm not sure your bf fully understands what that word means. This may be a very valuable lesson learned about him and your relationship.

This is advice from a 23 year old whose personal life is in shambles

23M in Arizona for reference. After some sacrifice and planning, I've managed to pay off a lot of the poor decision making of my youth. There are only two remaining collections accounts still open on my credit report. (I paid off about $3k amongst 3 accounts showing as closed on report) $730 for an apartment complex back in 2012. They refused to settle and I haven't contacted them in years. $560 for a dentist in 2017. Still increasing due to interest from the collections company. The goal is increasing my credit, which seems like a mystery at times. I just got a $200 intro credit card to start off making payments and have some positive action on my report. Will paying off the 2017 debt or just continuing the credit card payments increase my credit in the short term? Long term?

GetTheLedPaintOut says

Holy gods this is a giant red flag. First of all, everything you are saying is completely reasonable. Even if it weren't, the fact that he jumped right to labeling you as opposed to your action or opinion is a really bad sign. Are there other areas where he suffers from black and white thinking? Have you guys had big disagreements and/or fights before?

However his life is in shambles, he sees a therapist and is divorcing his mentally ill wife of 7 years. Currently lives with his brother

We were together ten years. Married seven. I learned she has BPD beginning of Feb. Came on here and saw all the advice. At first I was in denial. "My BPD is different". But once I knew, the gaslighting fell apart in front of my eyes. I couldn't engage anymore, and that made her all the more abusive. I finally knew the abuse wasn't my fault. I left the house March 1st. I just got off the phone with my wife. I told her we weren't going to be working towards a reconciliation anymore. She was upset, but wasn't fighting me. I hadn't heard her voice in a month. It was painful, but I feel so resolute. Things from here won't be easy going the whole way. I'm sure I will be lonely and remorseful and overwhelmed at times, but none of that will make this a mistake. I get to go out and be me. I get to find out what that means. Thank you so much to this sub. After my therapist and my brother (who has let me live with him and play with his adorable distracting children) you guys and girls have been the most helpful thing to me in this situation. Hopefully I have and can be helpful to people going forward.

Sorry to be rude but... HAHAHAHAH CUCK

It just keeps going on like this. The top posters in that thread do nothing but post in that subreddit like crabs trying to pull other people back into their bucked of misery.

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[–] ViperCarbz 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

You're the fucking hero Voat needs.

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[–] ReconquerCurvy 0 points 15 points (+15|-0) ago 

"Maybe" "I suppose" "I guess" "I don't really" Sounds like she doesn't have strong convictions toward these things she's chosen to bitch about.

This is evidence of her liberal brainwashing battling with her instinctual womanhood.

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[–] CheeseboogersGhost 1 points 11 points (+12|-1) ago 

I bet her vagina looks like a big, gutted-out roast beef sammich that got hit by a nigra in a chicken truck.

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[–] IGiveZeroFucks [S] 0 points 14 points (+14|-0) ago 

You aren't a true feminist unless you've rode at least 50 cocks by age 25. Being a soulless cum dumpster is empowering and brave.

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[–] cyclops1771 0 points 9 points (+9|-0) ago 

"I make a lot more money than him by a lot."

"The PATRIARCHY!"

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[–] IGiveZeroFucks [S] 0 points 8 points (+8|-0) ago 

She probably has a "career" as an administrator/manager that involves sending emails and browsing Facebook all day.

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[–] cyclops1771 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

Well, we know she's not doing anything physical or dangerous.

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