I am a 28 year old female diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder with severe dissociative symptoms. Despite being high-functioning, I have been hospitalized three times in locked psychiatric units. In addition to other applicable diagnoses, I have been misdiagnosed with Schizophrenia and subsequently spent months as a living zombie due to incorrect medication.
I wanted to do this AMA in hopes that I can shed a little bit of light on the stigma associated with Borderline and how real life with the disorder differs from the sensationalized depictions described online or in media. It is so upsetting to see that online advice for someone concerned about dating someone with Borderline is simply: RUN. RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN. Society's caricature of the disorder make it easy to feel ashamed and isolate yourself.
I'm happy to answer any question at all. Thanks!
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[–] Anabee15 ago
What's been the most difficult thing to convey to your friends and family, if anything, with regards to your diagnosis, how they should and should not treat you, etc?
[–] foxyface [S] ago
I think that the most difficult thing to convey, in general, is the gnawing emptiness I often feel and the dissociation. Sometimes I can even physically feel the emptiness, as if I am just a shell and there is a cavernous void at the core of my being. It is had to tell anyone that cares about you that you feel like that, especially if you can't give them a concrete reason why.
Patience and understanding is very key. I think that the best way for others to treat me has also been the hardest for me. My boyfriend is very understanding but will also hold me accountable for my actions. Instead of just letting me wiggle my way out of it, he helps me realize that I was being irrational or I overreacted. We've learned through trial and error that it is most helpful after I've calmed down a bit. It is hard but I want to get everything under control so I am willing to look my faults in the eye and make changes. Even though my parents mean well, they completely baby me and feed into the perception I have of myself as helpless and fragile which is my comfort zone. Although it definitely feels good, I think their lack of boundaries has made it difficult to change at times. I've gotten away with so much and them not stepping and saying that its not ok allows me to rationalize my slip ups.