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[–] FriendlyHumanBeing [S] 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago  (edited ago)

As reductionist as it sounds, I ultimately see myself as a biological machine. When I feel good, it's because of neurochemistry and whatever other crap I don't feel like making up; you know what I mean. So, I think about what sort of input does my brain need to make me feel good and happy? It sounds autistic, but I've lost the ability to anthropomorphize years ago.

You say that you require a "purpose". I don't think there is an innate purpose to human existence (at least what fictional stories sell us), so the statement is at best half-true. You want to strive past the mediocrity of the world. I think all of this has a common theme. Think back in the hunter-gatherer days. These sort of first-world problems are not really all there in simple days. We were pretty happy back then because we don't actually need a lot to be happy.

I think you need a tribe of sorts. People and a community that you feel good contributing and accomplishing tasks together. I don't see how some San Fransisco boy wanting to do some gay activist shit can be more fulfilled than a caveman bringing back the meat for his woman and kids.

Sometimes you have to be more reductionist, think about what fundamentally drives people to do things. Your sense of purpose can be derived from basic human needs.

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[–] daquanikus 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

If we are going into the metaphysical, I stand to be more fatalist. I think that we might have a set of choices, but it's up to us to decide the outcome of them. I think we can also reward our ego by doing what pleases us. I have the choice to study for an exam, and do well on it, or I can blow it off, and face the consequences. Studying is going to suck, but in the end, through the tough shit, I'll be happy.

It's interesting that you bring up the tribe concept. I hate everyone, and love being alone for long periods of time. But contradictory to that, I work very well in groups, and get a lot out of groups and bringing ideas to the table to think of something even greater. Whether it be my audaciousness or whatever else, I think there needs to be a good balance.

At any rate, I wish you luck with your endeavors, and hope that you can find a path through life that suits you. Maybe you should take some time to write out some goals. Not nessisarily a "purpose", but it's something to work towards. Reward yourself when you're there.

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[–] FriendlyHumanBeing [S] 0 points 1 points (+1|-0) ago 

My two goals are:

  • Bench press my own weight, do a pull-up and squat two 45 plates.
  • Get a bachelors degree in physics

Then, I can finally feel like an actual man. It's not great to think how easy it is for someone to rape me, that worry should be reserved for women.

Thank you for your kind words.

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[–] ashekchum 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago 

Ohh you should read The Red Queen Matt Ridley, it talks about the biomachine aspect and how really the ultimate goal is procreation and how that drives behavior. It's a good read regardless. Its fairly well know so you should be able to get a copy legitimate or illegitimate easily.

I do agree with your viewpoint on the world, and I know I'm not one of the most "happy" people myself.