Archived How can I fight the rampant abuse of inquisitive greetings without coming off as autistic? (AskVoat)
submitted ago by tanzmeister
Posted by: tanzmeister
Posting time: 5.3 years ago on
Last edit time: 5.3 years ago on
Archived on: 2/12/2017 1:51:00 AM
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7 upvotes, 3 downvotes (70% upvoted it)
Archived How can I fight the rampant abuse of inquisitive greetings without coming off as autistic? (AskVoat)
submitted ago by tanzmeister
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[–] Astromachine 0 points 4 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago
Saying "how's it going?" is a non-committal conversation starter. It leaves you, the receiver the opportunity to actually engage in a conversation or dismiss it it you like without any sort of social obligations. If I did care how you were doing and said "So, tell me how you're doing" this is much more forceful and, if you're not interested or comfortable with the conversation it is more difficult because you have to actually refuse me. Just saying "Hi" in passing also does not really tell you the person sending the greeting is open to a conversation. So, if there is something you want to talk about you have to be the one initiating the conversation.
[–] roboticon 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
But "how's it going?" isn't always a conversation starter -- how do you know whether someone saying this would really be open to a conversation or is just being polite?
[–] Astromachine ago
It isn't itself the conversation starter, it is a neutral invitation to start a conversation. At the very least, if you respond with a conversation the person who isn't interested then has to back out of it. In which case, those who are not open to conversations will not use it since there are lots of other polite greetings which don't open you up for conversation. Such as "good morning."