Hi. Female. 23. New to dating. Lightly saw three guys the past half a year or so, but cut if off before any even made it to kissing.
I don't really have anyone to talk about this stuff with. Can you guys on Voat give any advice to me? I'm finishing up school and approaching a point in my life where it's time to look into starting a family and setting down.
- Any insight on how to know what your "type" is? I am having issues knowing what personality traits to look for.
- I'm very attractive. I'm finding I have an issue where guys lie, say stuff that I want to hear, and ask me on innocent sounding dates then try to grope me and cuddle when they're still basically strangers to me. Any idea how to filter through guys who will waste my time and are more sexually focused as oppose to looking for a partner? It's very frustrating when I waste a few months/weeks on someone who doesn't take me seriously.
- With that said... One person told me not to tell men straight up that I'm a virgin and want to wait until marriage. They told me third date. But I live in a pretty liberal state and guys seem to want to move faster than that. The last male I saw was a pretty quiet med student. 28. I thought he was certain to move slow but even he tried to grind against me the second date we had. So part of me wants to tell guys right away, the other part kinda knows no guy would want me. Probably. I feel like they'd immediately lose interest.
- What are appropriate dates? The date with that med student was supposed to be us cooking a meal together at his apartment and then watch a movie together. I didn't know that meant sex was implied. What are innocent dates that are good ways to bond? I'd feel more comfortable pitching date ideas as oppose to my potential partners in the future after what happened. Are there any dates that almost always imply sex that I should absolutely avoid?
- How quickly does the average guy usually make a move? Would it be awkward if I straight asked them to let me set the pace and make the moves when I want? I'm a pretty low maintenance and straight forward person as oppose to romantic. So just being straight forward and telling them when I'm ready to hold hands, cuddle, kiss, or anything else sounds much more appealing than whatever is romantic about men making moves. I don't know if that would be infringing upon a person's manhood or if it's important for the male to take control.
- Any general advice/stuff you wish you were told when you were younger?
Feel free to just answer one or two points. I'd just appreciate any insight or advice I could get.