I'll give some background here: In high school, I did a type of debate called policy debate. It has a high concentration of SJW ideologues, and I was sucked into their little cult.
For an example, take a look at this. Expand the "K vs Niles West CH" under "Cites." To extract a quote from this:
Thus they map civil society through the reconfiguration of freedom and maintaining anti-blackness – thus the only option is to refuse the world to death – instead of resurrecting the corpse of blackness, our politics brings social life to social death
In other words, as their author, Frank B. Wilderson III writes, "it is inconceivable that the dead (blacks) can be brought back to life; but it is possible to imagine a schema in which the living (whites) are brought to death."
For quite some time, I believed this. I believed that the "Black body," and only the Black body, as these authors, called afropessimists, call black people, was socially dead. In essence, this means that the Middle Passage, in the process of turning Africans into slaves, rendered them into cultureless, fungible, lifeless flesh--commodities--good only for work on the plantation. And that this had extended into the modern era through policing (i.e., police murders of black people and the whole corporate prison complex). That slavery had not died with the Emancipation Proclamation--but had only hidden behind the supposedly post-racist structures of society.
Initially, using the afropessimist argument was just a strategic move. But, as time went forward, I really began to believe that Whites had to die; to "become body bags." That civil society itself--everything we have right now--had to be annihilated (burned to the ground) so that black people could truly be free.
I was also a hardline feminist. I believed in the patriarchy.
I believed in the ideology espoused by radical queer theorists (look up Lee Edelman's No Future), who claim that the reproductive act itself is anti-queer. That straight people are in essence evil simply because they are straight. That children, as the future, must be refused. That we must stop reproducing, because queer folks can't.
Note that I am a straight white male.
This was self-hatred.
I really believed that I had to denigrate myself, silence myself, because I was born wrong. Because I thought that my ancestors had committed atrocities and that I was responsible for those same atrocities. That I had to atone.
I eventually began to regain my sanity, essentially, when I began dating a black girl who had her head on straight. She convinced me, through actions, demonstration, and argument, that I was wrong. I began reading Orthodox Marxists (I know, perhaps not the most correct people; but the one thing they have right, in my opinion, is that, to the extent that privilege exists, it is first and foremost a product of wealth rather than race, gender, sexuality, etc.)
I eventually found Tumblr in Action, and, through humor, I began to realize how irrational my beliefs were. How I had been sucked into a cult. I wanted out.
So I left. I lost a lot of "friends." I didn't care. I was done with the self-flagellation.
I now identify as a center-left libertarian.
Tl;dr: White male hated himself; really believed hardcore SJW bullshit. Got girlfriend, got out. It's a cult. AMA.