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[–] 18117027? ago 

I can't bring myself to do things like lift

You're going to have to, man. Do power lifting and focus on the numbers, put them on a spreadsheet so you can graph them and sperg out a bit. As your numbers rise and you can see that charted, it will give you motivation. You get the most and fastest gains early on. Once you've got a bit of a muscle and strength base you can join a BJJ gym. Since you'll have that strength and physique base you'll get a bit of respect already. Then you have to focus your dedication into the martial art. Your team members (martial arts gyms that compete are de facto teams) will respect you for that as well. Meanwhile, your comradery will grow. Just make sure you don't cheap out on a martial arts gym in terms of its cost or reputation. Join the absolute best gym that you can afford. Doing otherwise can have real repercussions such as patterning poor fundamentals, or a higher risk of injury.