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[–] 17699182? ago 

/sig/, if my family is shit, should I just have a bare minimum relationship with them? I don't hate them, but we never do anything together and there's even a sort of aversion to spending time with each other. It's difficult to describe. Is trying to reconnect with an absent parent a good idea?

>>13022327

Are you familiar with Dr. Sarno, anon? I "got over" my TMS issues after reading and applying his book. I was suffering back pain at my last job and physical therapy wasn't doing shit. After a bunch of lurking, I ran into a comment that recommended checking him out. If you get ANY kind of chronic/psychosomatic pain, I can't stress the importance of this book enough.

Healing Back Pain: The Mind-Body Connection.

One of my personal recommendations on addressing TMS is to NEVER victimize yourself to the pain and to properly express anger. By not doing the latter, your brain "holds onto" your rage and it manifests in all sorts of ways. As for the former, victimizing yourself to your own pain just creates a cycle: you're "hurt" (re: in pain, not injured) so you can't do things and then you get more miserable and angry and the pain doesn't go away. There are stories from other people of this going on for years, I had just about enough of it after a couple of months, I don't wanna imagine it going on for longer.

TMS is truly impressive, it shows you how powerful the mind is. Hives, Irritable Bowl Syndrome, Carpal Tunnel and back pain all plagued my life at one point, but now they're just signs that I'm fucking pissed/stressed and I should do something about it. Extreme lack of life direction and getting somewhat involved with a woman who insisted on suffering instead of improving her life probably caused these problems to flare up.

I also think TMS might have something to do with how energy "flows" through the body, which can be activated by physical stimuli such as standing/sitting in one place for long periods of time or sleeping in a bad spot. Your brain "chooses" a spot with stagnant energy and dumps pain there. I think proper meditative breathing helps with the movement of energy, I tried it not too long ago and my face and arms had a similar feeling to that of when your leg falls asleep. This is all speculation of course, I'd need to do more reading.

tl;dr: Your brain is subconsciously trying to bring attention to your life's problems by "sabotaging" you. Go down the list of being a healthy individual, and if you still get chronic pain, you need a bigger mental change. Do NOT give in to passivity and if you think of quitting something, really think about why you want to quit. Most of the time it'll be because you want to be lazy.

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[–] 17702357? ago 

Regarding your family, it depends on the cause of the distance. For instance, a distant parent, what has caused this seperation, was it abuse, did they suffer some terrible event that they could not recover from, we need further details to ascertain the cause.

A base outline I personally follow regarding family is fairly simple; offer up the respect due for those deserving and those undeserving merely just maintain cordial relations. Sometimes we outgrow our parents or siblings, sometimes they outgrow us, growth is (or was pre kike culture) the primordial soul of the family unit. A father grows in wisdom to share with their son, a son grows further and takes all he learned and augments it further thus the lineage grows in wisdom. For those undeserving waste no time on trying to maintain a pointless connection, merely exchange greeting cards and moderate greetings at familial events and leave it at that. Blood is vitally important but some are not always worthy of our immediate respect.

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[–] 17705385? ago 

The distance is from being kicked out for abuse/negligence. I haven't seen my mother in years and there was definitely mental illness involved with such behavior.

I don't have a family outside my immediate one due to time/language barrier/distance and as stated, my family doesn't really family. I'm probably falling for the "It's been XX years, surely they're better people now!," meme. Ultimately I choose who to be around, and when I look at the past, things weren't completely awful, but something, somewhere just went wrong.

Don't surround yourself with bad people, right?