Profile overview for DonnieDumpster69.
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3 highest rated comments:

Are our servers ready for this? submitted by BustyChicksFTW to AskVoat

DonnieDumpster69 1 points 31 points (+32|-1) ago

I hope people remember that Reddit isn't burning just because of its terrible management, but because of the community it's been cultivating, too. It's gotten full of ultra-pc shills who bend over backwards to justify any terrible idea the admins come up with (it's not censorship if it's a private company!), wannabe 4chan kiddies (hey check it out I still make advice animals in 20 fucking 15) and repost-spamming power users (Gallowboob and iBleedOrange). Not to mention the god awful novelty accounts.

The whole thing is rotten, from the top to the bottom. The only thing worth saving are the weird/honest niche subs. Once something gets popular it gets watered down by the lowest common denominator. If the users flood Voat expect it to become Reddit 2 instead of its successor. Most of the people here who came from Reddit did so because they value their free speech and freedom to share whatever they want. We got the kind of redditor that made Reddit interesting back in 2009. If we get flooded by them the decay will speed up and leave us with 2015 Reddit.

We already got Unidan coming over here. Same name and everything, went over to /v/introductions and introduced himself as Unidan, riding the karma high from Reddit. Next thing you know we're going to get more Reddit "celebrities" trying to invest in their Voat count in case Reddit shits the bed for good.

I say fuck 'em. The site's full of lurkers and casuals who just come to browse /r/pics, /r/funny and /r/MotherfuckingAdviceAnimalsGoddamnPeopleYouAreRetarded. If the ship crashes they can go back to Facebook or 9gag to continue their steady flow of reposted stolen content and stale memes.

We're also going to get an influx of lukewarm users. The kind who don't contribute anything positive, but are ready to go once there's shilling to be done. The kind of cannon fodder whose only purpose seems to be to pick a side and start petty drama (I hope to god no SRS or SubReddiDrama users en up here).

I hope to god, allah, yahweh, baphomet and Bruce Springsteen that this site doesn't go down the shitter like Reddit did. Even if it means having 1/30 of its userbase.

Hey Voat, what does your username mean or why did you choose it? submitted by AlexandraReese to AskVoat

DonnieDumpster69 0 points 11 points (+11|-0) ago

My nickname's been Donnie since middle school ( I have no idea why, since my name is not Donnie or anything similar to it.) and 69 'cus I'm a mature adult.

The 'dumpster' bit is where the story lies.

When I was in highschool I had a habit of drinking canned iced tea. The stuff was just brown sugar water but I loved it and kept drinking it every day out of habit. My mom would buy the 32 can value pack at Sam's Club every month, so she was an enabler. People knew me as the guy with the iced tea, but it didn't replace my original nickname "Donnie". Donnie Tea, Iced Donnie, Donnie that faggot who's always sucking tea. It didn't bother me. Then a friend of mine pointed something out about the can.

I had always noticed that the cans said "ME 5 c" but, me being the dumb kid I was, didn't know what it meant. One day my friend tells me that if you bring it to a recycling center they give you 5 cents for it. That was interesting. Considering all the cans I went through in a month plus the fact that my mom got them at a discounted price meant that I could be drinking that shit practically for free! So every time I finished a can I put it in my locker and at the end of the month I'd go to the recycling center with my haul and cash in. It was a pretty sweet gig and I was helping the environment, so I felt pretty high and mighty.

One day at lunch when I was drinking my tea I see this kid throw an empty coke can at a trash bin. He misses by a mile and leaves it on the ground, so I went over, picked it up and put it in my locker with my other cans. After that I would go around grabbing any empty cans I could and stashing them in my locker. Now, thing about this whole activity is that I didn't really wash the cans, so they all had a little bit of residual fluid in them. That meant that my locker was exposed to this moisture all the time, which led to mold.

There was mold and mildew inside my locker, and it began to stink to high heaven and back. You couldn't walk down that hallway without getting your eyebrows singed off by the miasma of stale tea and coagulated Yoohoo. It got so bad that I got a demerit for it and my parents had to be contacted. Then I got caught eating Monica out behind the dumpster by the gym so they gave me the nickname dumpster.

That's how I got the moniker.

What's your favorite topping on pizza? submitted by Huntertaco to AskVoat

DonnieDumpster69 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago

Pinapple and ham is the greatest pizza topping ever. Funny, since it's two toppings. You'd think that would make it two times better than all other toppings but it's exponentially better than any amateur crap like chicken or anchovies.

My buddy Rick is a huge fan of ham and pineapple pizza and he shared his love for the hawaiian with me back when I scoffed at the idea of fruit on a pizza. We were at a party and he's in charge of getting the pizza. He comes back with a stack of large pies and one small box on top. I ask him what the tiny box was for and he told me it was his personal pineapple pizza. He offered to trade me a pineapple slice for one of my sausage slices. I agreed and tried it and was instantly hooked! It was amazing the way the sweetness from the pineapple complemented the saltiness of the cheese.

After that I ordered pineapple pizza all the time. Pizza night was pineapple night for me. Suddenly all other toppings started to seem inferior to me. I couldn't stomach pepperoni and the sight of sausage pizza made me want to stab my eyes. Then all food other than pineapple pizza was like garbage to me. I saw people eating hamburgers and cakes and it just made my stomach churn. Pineapple pizza was all the food I needed, so I ate that for 3 months straight. My buddy Rick had to intervene because my blood was contaminated with pineapple juice from eating it so much. After a year of therapy I can eat regular food now and only partake in pineapple pizza on special occasions like weddings.

Best pizza topping ever.

3 lowest rated comments:

As a redditor reposting on voat submitted by Teddyninja to funny

DonnieDumpster69 2 points -2 points (+0|-2) ago

Funny how that works.

I went to Chipotle the other day with my friend Steve. We were about to order when this homeless guy walks up to us and asks us if we can get him something. My friend only had enough for his order but I had a few dollars to cover for the guy. I order and ask them for double meat using this trick and give the homeless dude a shit-eating grin like "Hey bud, youse gettin yourself some free meats here!" but he just gave me a side glance.

We finish ordering and I hand the homeless dude his burrito. He tanks me and shuffles off outside. I sit down with my friend and we begin feasting when I notice something out of the corner of my eye. There's a security guard escorting the homeless dude off the premises. That's when I notice the homeless guy had the burrito on his dick and was using it to jack off.

You know what I like about voat? It's absent all the negativity and bullying thrown around on the other site. submitted by keeganspeck to MeanwhileOnReddit

DonnieDumpster69 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago

Bullying/being a dick is the fastest way to bring an entire community down. It's terrible how fast it corrodes.

When i was in elementary school me and my buddy Melissa started a club. it was the "Brotherhood Order Of Great Elves and Stuff", or "BOOGERS" because, well, we were in elementary school. A few days after forming our club and creating the secret handshake and everything another friend of ours joins in. Then another, and another and another until we had 10 members in a week. Now, this may not seem like a lot, but for us that was astronomical. We were a force to be reckoned with. Until Kyle showed up. Kyle was this kid no one got along with. He was a complete jerk to everyone; he spat in other kids' lunches, lied to the teacher, never did his homework, never shared his crayons etc. A complete chode, but we let him into the club to be nice to him. Maybe the kid just needed some attention. We were wrong.

Things went to shit when Kyle joined. He started spreading rumors within the club and sowing dissent. He'd steal things from the clubhouse (we had this sick cardboard fort in my friend Becky's backyard where we kept gluesticks and crayons.) but no one ever saw him do any of that except for me. I told the other members but they wouldn't believe me. I thought it was crazy, then they kicked me out of the club! Even Melissa was against me. In a few short days Kyle had managed to turn the entire club against each other. Kyle moved after that year and got hit by a truck while crossing the street. I went to his funeral and knocked his casket over. It wasn't the Kyle in my elementary school, because he was my imaginary friend.

A galaxy in a flower submitted by Xexyz128 to pics

DonnieDumpster69 0 points 0 points (+0|-0) ago

Those flowers are incredibly beautiful.

My neighbor William used to grow these on a window sill in his kitchen. They were incredible, always the center of conversation whenever he had company over. Guy had a green thumb and could make anything grow, but those flowers were his pride and joy. Until one day this friend of his comes over. Real skeevy guy, the kind of friend that makes you question someone's judgement. Apparently they were real close in elementary school, according to what I heard, but the guy was a total dickbag. No one liked him except for William, who stood up for him whenever someone bad mouthed him (which was very often).

One day William goes over to his window to check on his precious petunias. Lo and behold, they were missing. He couldn't believe someone would come into his house and steal some flowers off the window. I told him his skeevy friend Gabe had done it, but he wasn't having any of that... until he walked in on Gabe passed out on the floor with his petunias all over the living room. William snapped, grabbed a knife from the kitchen and held it up to Gabe's neck and whispered into his ear "Marvel's Avengers Age of Ultron premieres this summer."