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[–] 3110840? 0 points 16 points (+16|-0) ago 

Don't worry, he's keeping the donuts safe in his belly.

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[–] AOU 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

The donuts dumpster.

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[–] ForgotMyName ago 

FATS! What have you been doing all day? I've hardly seen you at your desk!

I have secured every pastry within a one-block radius sir!

Do you have any for me?

Yes, yes of course sir.

nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom

[–] [deleted] 0 points 6 points (+6|-0) ago  (edited ago)

[Deleted]

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[–] Dontbeafatshit 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

I do armed security as a side gig you wouldn't believe how many food dumpsters come wheezing up to me asking how they can get into it. It's pathetic.

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[–] ForgotMyName 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

I blame that horrible mall cop movie... in part.

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[–] 2drunk 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

If security means he watches hidden cameras in changing rooms.

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[–] RielDtok_ 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

He also suffers from too much food security.

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[–] geese 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

Stands in front of the door, but is so big he blocks the entirety of it, perps can't get out of the building. Sounds like good security to me

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[–] FreedomToast 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

Greg Proops + 400 Big Macs.

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[–] TunaAndCucumbers 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

And now, I want to watch Whose Line.

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[–] Fustilarian 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

Guarding the fucking pantry

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[–] AFishyFez 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

Wherever he's being "security" for probably has something like the first Indiana Jones. It's probably like if you steal doughnuts or whatever, this blob just comes rolling down towards you like that boulder.

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