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[–] jadedcupcake 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

More like shield his eyes so he doesn't claw them out and then projectile vomit.

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[–] wtfomg77 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

If your boyfriend has secret beastiality fantasies/tendencies then yeah you should be worried.

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[–] ShitlordedByFacts 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago  (edited ago)

I'll tell my wife. I doubt her weight training is sufficient to fight off a fully teched ultralisk.

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[–] Heritagefloral 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

This blob looks like a grotesque parody of a supermodel coming out of the pool for a photo shoot.

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[–] Carsandsarcasm 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

" (...) snatch away any man candy you don't want to lose" ... in my rolls.

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[–] Superior_Guhnetiks 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

My husband would probably vomit on you. He's not into lard bodies.

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[–] Triggeredtoshitlord 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

The only way I'd lose my man candy to that thing is if he got caught in its gravitational pull

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[–] Pandapopo 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

Well she's right, I am very disturbed and traumatized looking at her photo.

...I think it's time for me to set up patreon

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