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[–] DorothyMantooth 0 points 8 points (+8|-0) ago 

She is not a hobbit! She is sexy, and womanly, she smokes a pipe and she can blow those big rings everywhere...Hold on.

Okay, that is NOT a hobbit pipe, for your information, it is a personal oral humidifier, to keep all the wrinkles around her mouth from showing. So ha ha, all you haters, HA!

(Bitch, why you ain't a hobbit again?)

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[–] Carsandsarcasm 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

I imagine that the weight of all the lard slowly crushes them. Like slowly stepping on a can.

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[–] ayybrah ago 

lmao

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[–] rompele ago 

Because when you’re short and you get fat, this is what happens.

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[–] Titanbikes4ever 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

It's the weird angles at which they photograph themselves to try and look thinner, it messes with the proportions

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[–] FattestConsequence ago 

A fat shelf on its SHIN. Just... goddamn.

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[–] Mass_Eject ago 

All I can think of is the oompa loompa song for Augustus Gloop.

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[–] deathsquad 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

Hobbits never wore shoes and they never got that fat despite being much shorter, probably due to their naturalistic lifestyle and avoidance of modernity (Hobbits were a projection of Tolkien's own contempt for industrialisation).

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