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[–] 16399379? ago 

Secondly, I was visited several times by a female scientist who worked with NASA. This scientist was pulling students in the GATE program out of class one by one, and showing them boxes of dirt.

Protip, she wasn't from NASA.

I remember this same kind of weird interview shit from when I was in elementary school sewardanon from archives, kind of funny to see so many of us back here again, except for me it was a random selection of students with intentionally varying abilities - a disabled kid or two, myself and another gifted student, and a few normal kids - who were interviewed by some (((suited guy))). My school was extremely abusive as well, but in different ways, and it wasn't severe in the same way as your experience was. My first grade teacher was the wife of the warden of the state prison across the bay, and honestly she probably could have done his job better than even he did, given how psychotic she was. Cunt wanted to drug me for "ADHD" claiming I was retarded, and my mom immediately threatened a lawsuit because she wasn't actually certified to be a teacher in the first place. My gifted instructor for some reason saw something distinct in me, and separated me from the other four students and put me on an even more advanced course schedule with a lot of self-guided learning; I remember being introduced to physics and biology subjects way beyond my grade level, and was encouraged to speculate about alien life not ayyliums, but actual xenobiology stuff. I also got the typical zener card "memory game" shit that some other anons report from GATE programs, and the same weird questioning using hypotheticals. I was pulled out of there after two years to be homeschooled, but was traumatized for a couple years by some near death experiences I had there, all involving strangling. I recovered from whatever fuckery that happened mostly because I already had redpilled parents, and I'm sorry to hear how badly it's affected you, anon. I suppose at this point, we're all in this together.

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[–] 16349292? ago 

>>12709688

this makes me think of some "HALO spartan program" type shit, where they steal kids and augment their minds and bodies to be super soldaten. In a cinematic clip from HALO 4 it talks about how the spartans exhibit "mild sociopathic tendencies" and "difficulty in socialization" and "efficient behavior in hazardous situations" and the interrogator guy makes mention that master chief "was at his core, broken" and mentions "lack of basic humanity"

What if all of this media is just subliminal programming? it is

The way I see it they have one of two goals with "gifted children"

  1. create autistic super soldiers

or

  1. (most likely scenario) they were trying to inhibit those who would have the most potential to be an autistic super soldier.

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[–] 16370727? ago 

Who's to say they didn't create autistic soldiers that don't question where their orders come from and have all the traits listed?

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[–] 16399341? ago 

not possible as the autist personality type is naturally one of a curious nature which = questioning. it wouldn't hold up. only a brain dead zombie could do that, but then again a brain dead zombie isn't really good for anything, so it's kind of a null point

>>12717810

perhaps he's wondering why someone would ruin a mans life, before throwing him in with NatSocs?

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[–] 16370728? ago 

who's to say /pol/ isn't where we receive our training and eventually orders?

a hurtbox that puts your soul to the ultimate test (years of blackpill)

just imagine the righteous anger and violence that could be unleashed from this place when the opportunity is given

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[–] 16336250? ago 

Interesting. I was also in GT at a school in Austin. My parents thought I was very bright, but one of my teachers would consistently get angry at me in her class. I did a lot of dumb kid stuff because I was oblivious that it was bod or did it by accident, but she insisted to my parents that I did it on purpose for attention. They knew I wasn't but they had me take a neuropsych exam to see if I had add or other cognitive disabilities. The report came back that I had add and some other neuro issues but it also said that I tested in the supirior category for intelligence. I can't remember if this was before or after I got into GT. I took their test and fell just short of the border to get in, but my mom pushed for it. Oddly enough I have little memory of GT all together. I remember the first day pretty well, a fun project we did, and 5th grade GT where they would talk to us about think tanks and pushing us to work in them, but I think it's weird that a large chunk of it is missing from memory.

On another note, did anyone have childhood fears of general MK Ultra shit? Every time something like that would come up in a cartoon I would be overcome with absolute fear. I had a big fear of the government, aliens, or psychiatric wards, but I have no clue where it stems from.

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[–] 16331159? ago 

That sucks, man. I feel you.

I believe it is possible to change. It's just tedious because results take time.

I cut my diet down to rice and beef, because it's a guaranteed clear mind for me, with a variety of other things in moderation. I'll have to try that fasting, too.

I believe it is possible to rehabilitate your mental functions through competitive games. I took up playing DotA when I realized I could tell which part of my mind was engaged when I played. Am I thinking and predicting, or am I feeling and reacting? Am I planning or am I reliving? Do I really understand what happened and should go to the next game, or am I avoiding the memory of failure and should watch the replay? Did I rage? Raging only hinders team performance. What could I have done to resolve the situation? What could I have done to win, from hero selection, to communication, to the end? What are the professional styles of play? What low tier pub styles have I seen or can make up for myself to win games? Should I be watching better players right now or should I be resting and posting on 8ch?

I know games sound like a waste of time, but it was all I could do before. I could play for many hours, slipping this rehab in. Now I can read books by my own choosing without feeling that fucking burning in my mind.

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[–] 16327295? ago 

Fuck I never thought about the bullying and discrimination from the teachers… About two years before I told them to fuck off and I'm not taking anymore tests my 4th grade teacher accused me of cheating and ruining the curve for the math final. Because I didn't show any of my work on long division, and achieved a perfect test score.

Not only did she tell the whole class it was my fault everyone else got only as high as a B because I cheated, but she called a conference with my parents to attempt to poison my relationship. This backfire spectacularly when my father (who had been working with me on math because it's my favorite subject of study) suggested she give me an pop quiz with everything there, and me solving the problems on the chalk-board.

Once again I achieved a perfect score without showing my work. Her tone never changed. Even though I had just proven I wasn't a cheater she actually started treating me worse because I proved her wrong.

She never told the class the truth, and within months the niggers started trying to bully me to the point that when I finally retaliated I sent the biggest nigger to the hospital with big bloody nigger lips.

The other thing I remember was these "Iowa Basic Skills Tests" that I would routinely score in the top 1-2% of the USA in science and math.

FUCK. THESE. PEOPLE. SO. HARD.

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[–] 16686864? ago 

I had issues with my 4th grade teacher as well. I got perfect marks throughout the entirety of my schooling beforehand (including 4th grade), and my teacher had the audacity to tell my parents things such as "I don't like to think", or other vague yet demeaning remarks. It felt remarkably similar to bullying that I did nothing to deserve. This was also about the same time I started attending GATE classes, back in 2001-2003.

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[–] 16686872? ago 

I had issues with my 4th grade teacher as well

Interesting, I also had trouble with my 4th grade teacher. I wonder if it's because as a boy you start acting more mature and less like a toddler? The cunt was an obvious man-hating dyke, looking back on it.

I can do this too sometimes. My mom is an identical twin, so I grew up with stories of precognition and psychic dog whistles. Why are we not screaming at kikes, driving them to suicide right nao?

Not the worst idea ever. I'm kind of tied up rewiring the world political structure though, and I've been using my energy on much bigger things than being annoying to some individual kike. For anyone who wanted to try it, it's not a bad experiment though.

>>12756614

Wtf is this correlation between near drowning experiences and being here? I was also on British version of GATE.

We haven't figured it out yet, but it's a bit startling. It's possible we're in an afterlife holding cell for drowned kids, which, if true, should mean we can rewrite the entire thing like a lucid dream. Let's try that, right? See if it works out.

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[–] 16327280? ago 

Are you still around Houstonanon with similar experience and one year older online now

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[–] 16325943? ago 

The bullying you experience at school sounds like some sort of social experiment. Especially since the counselor also didn't give a fuck about how you were feeling. She was merely reporting the results of the experiment, and probably glad they managed to fuck you up.

This whole thing reminds me of our situation in society now. Others are doing the bullying (raping, violence), but conservative White men get blamed for being disruptive (racist, evil, violent).

I went to a regular school here in Finland, so I have no experiences to match yours, but there was some mind fuckery there too. I used be quite good at doing math equations in my head. During tests I would sometimes just write the answer without writing the whole process on the paper, but the teacher said I have to write the whole equation. I thought it was somehow dirty or invasive to show my thinking process on the paper, but I did it. And I guess that wasn't a big deal. But as I said, I was quite good at doing calculations in my head, but they forced me to use a calculator, and eventually it ruined any math talent I used to have. I certainly was never any kind of prodigy in math, and I didn't like math, but I was above average.

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[–] 17200135? ago 

The bullying you experience at school sounds like some sort of social experiment. Especially since the counselor also didn't give a fuck about how you were feeling. She was merely reporting the results of the experiment, and probably glad they managed to fuck you up.

This whole thing reminds me of our situation in society now. Others are doing the bullying (raping, violence), but conservative White men get blamed for being disruptive (racist, evil, violent).

THAT'S IT! THAT'S MY ENTIRE EARLY SCHOOL YEARS!

Even my parents described it as "they only see your reaction" at the time, never doubting when I described the bullying aimed at me. Yet only I was ever punished, the bullies just got away with it. Every fucking time. Well, not in the long run, they've since gotten theirs, but at the time… I could understand the school shooters but I saw the school itself as the problem, not my classmates.

blogpost redacted to avoid dox risk

>>12710203

Fuck I never thought about the bullying and discrimination from the teachers

I never recognized it until now. But it happened to me, too.

>>12712346

did anyone have childhood fears of general MK Ultra shit? Every time something like that would come up in a cartoon I would be overcome with absolute fear.

No fear, but, now that I think of it, a bizarre interest in that type of conspiracy theory. My dad let me read all the books I wanted, but I remember somehow knowing to never speak of those. A strange-as-fuck interest for that age, too, now that I think about it.

>>12715036

The way I see it they have one of two goals with "gifted children"

  1. create autistic super soldiers

or

  1. (most likely scenario) they were trying to inhibit those who would have the most potential to be an autistic super soldier.

Or both. Two competing factions. I may have been in a place where the dominant faction kept changing. Sucks to be (((faction 2))) if the leads I've got now pan out. Thanks, Paperclip.

>>12715592

Another theme that was present in these threads was that most of us had a feeling that we were born to become something much greater, to become ubermensch, to reach out for the stars. Then something … changed and we ended up being largely disappointed. Some anons posted theories how we were programmed for space colonization through certain media but something didn't go according to plan.

I think I know that plan and I think I know (((what))) (((changed))) too.

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[–] 16686865? ago 

The calculator thing is less about making you an idiot or whatever shady shit the GATEniggers were up to and more because the maths becomes less about learning and familiarizing yourself with basic arrithmatic (which is why you got in trouble for using a calculator in primrary school; you needed to intuitively understand + and - and whatnot) and more about different ways to use basic arrithmatic. This means that a) they no longer give a fuck how quickly you can solve 420X69 in your head and b) the class will complete the work faster and therefore learn more by using calculators.

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[–] 16332593? ago 

>>12710203

>>12710331

Thank you for the kind words, anons.

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[–] 16325951? ago 

Back in elementary school, we had a thing called the "Mad Minute" where students were given a sheet of paper with basic arithmetic problems and told to solve as many as the possibly could within 60 seconds. High scores were rewarded with bonus points, and a near-perfect score provided a small bag of candy on the last day of school. In third grade (age 8), before GATE, I was so good at the Mad Minute that the teachers actually had to stop rewarding me with future bags of candy – I had already earned more than I could possibly eat. Fast forward two years later and I could hardly even solve a fifth of the Mad Minute sheets. My mental organization had deteriorated to the point that I had lost the ability to solve most simple math problems with high confidence.

I don't think this is a coincidence.

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[–] 16327277? ago 

tfw was top of class in elementary for math

tfw years later dropped out of highschool, still can't do algebra

what the fuck

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[–] 16324617? ago 

I've experienced paranoia, depression and most importantly, BRAIN FOG, ever since.

I know exactly what you're going through and would recommend that you immediately consider improving your diet, exercising, and fasting, not an intermittent fast, but the whole nine yards. 15 days. Repent, and pray.

As someone who suffered from every single symptom you described and then some I can tell you the intrusive thoughts nearly vanished when I fasted. For the first time in years I had complete control over my mind, and I was at peace.

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[–] 17000593? ago 

Repent, and pray.

Fuck this.

>>12709696

Start keeping a dream diary notebook next to your bed. Record the date, how you felt before laying down to sleep, the moon cycle (to encourage awareness), and if your efforts were successful (if you remembered anything. If you fail to recollect, write: I chose not to remember my dreams today.

Start doing silent mind meditations, where you push away all thoughts from your mind (as if your mind is a genuine place, where things can occupy space in it) and sit in absolute silence.

Religion is useful to those who do not want to see things for what they are. If you choose to self actualize fully, you can protect the things that matter to you in ways that you now think are superhuman.

I wish someone told me this a decade ago.

The Truth will set you free - But ignorance is the easy way.

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[–] 16325927? ago 

I've tried paleo dieting paired with weight-lifting for about a couple of months and noticed an improvement in my general health, but most of the mental duress was unaffected. The only thing that has helped cognitively was Vyvanse/Concerta, but I can't stand taking drugs for a marginal increase in my mental efficiency.

I suspect that the outcomes of my experience with the GATE program imparted some kind of irreversible brain damage, tbqhwyf.

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[–] 16325928? ago 

Paleo is good but the most important part is prayer and fasting.

You need to detox your system for it to heal.

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[–] 16325923? ago 

im not from usa, but i have the same symptoms, going on for a long time now. cant stop the thoughts sometimes, its maddening. i get a horrible thought and then spend a lot of time repenting