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[–] SourPatchWatermelon 0 points 10 points (+10|-0) ago 

Honestly I think it's easier. People who have left college and spent a few years in the world are more likely to communicate exactly what they want, meaning it's easier to find a fwb.

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[–] libby [S] ago 

Are people more direct about it as they get older? I feel like with younger people it's not quite so clear cut as people may start as friends, start having sex, and never really establish if they're in a romantic relationship or not.

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[–] Whiskey_In_A_TeaCup 0 points 7 points (+7|-0) ago  (edited ago)

Easier. Also the terms are more clear cut and expectations seem to be more equitable. Meaning that younger women (not all, certainly) tend to use FWB as a pathway to something more OR find that they want something more as it progresses. I find that both genders are pretty much on the same page regarding goals, expectations, level of emotion invested etc, as one gets older. Communication is also much better. Generally speaking, of course.

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[–] libby [S] 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

My LTR SO and I have considered splitting and I am really positive that romance isn't my thing. I'm crazy about my SO but I'm really too much of a loner to make a romantic relationship work. If we do spilt, I'm trying to gauge how likely it is that I'll be able to have some enjoyable companionship and sex without having to invest too much emotionally (though more than a one night stand sort of thing). Doing stuff together, cuddling, and sex are all nice. I'm just concerned that beyond 30 it could be hard to find people interested. Sounds like that is an unfounded worry.

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[–] Whiskey_In_A_TeaCup 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

Yes, I think you will be pleasantly surprised. Particularly with those who already had a marriage or a long term relationship under their belt. Good luck to you whatever your outcome is.

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[–] Kelspa 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

Im in my 40s and its easier, I have a life and just need a little fun once and a while. a lot of people feel the same way.

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[–] libby [S] ago 

How emotionally invested do you get? Are we talking just sex or someone you could go hang out with, catch a film with, or grab a bite somewhere together? I'd be particularly interested if that's changed with time as I'd like someone who's a good friend too.

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[–] Kelspa 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

It depends, some woman I've got extremely attached to and others its just like going out with friends but you get sexy time after. I have kids from a prior relationship so I don't have a lot of time, so when I do its nice to have someone fun to go out with that it low maintenance, fun and also just looking to have fun.

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[–] GeneralBoobington 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

I'm 32 and a chick; it's rather easy, actually. I think at my age we've all seen what happens when one isn't honest with another whether it be admitting you can't do FWB 'cos of emotions or leading someone on to believe FWB is more than that. I will say this, though, your humanity remains intact: someone WILL catch feelings... it's totally normal. Sometimes it's me and sometimes it's the other person. That never gets easier and the inevitable rejection it leads to never gets easier either (giving or receiving).

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[–] libby [S] 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

How often does one or both catch a case of the feels? Can you pretty much plan on that being how it ends?

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[–] GeneralBoobington 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

eh, it feels like it does always end like that. i think ONCEEEE did it end with us just eventually not talking anymore. not in a bad way, but just drifted apart and found other people type of thing.

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[–] ihaveabulldoge 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

Depends on the other person and level of friendship/intimacy.

[–] [deleted] 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

[Deleted]

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[–] libby [S] ago 

I feel like you're in your 40s from another post I read. Do you think the market is easier for men or women?

Any tips on avoiding people who are really attached? That's exactly the sort of drama and headache I'd like to avoid.

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[–] ihaveabulldoge 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

It's easier because swinging and open relationships are easier (let's face it, it's not easy) when you have a solid bond with your SO. Additionally, being older gives you time to know what you want and understand that new toy lust and know how to handle it before becoming all ocd about a new playthinf.

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[–] libby [S] 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

Are people in open relationships common potential FWBs? I'm not sure I'd be interested in being with someone who's attached (would have to think about it). Would I be severely limiting my options if I excluded that pool of people?

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[–] ihaveabulldoge 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

Yes. Why would it matter if they are attached? You don't want a relationship, they won't leave the SO for you, it's a perfect situation.