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[–] DashingLeech ago 

There are two components to my answer.

Why do I feel like everyone's judging me or like I'm a failure?

I think you need to separate "is it wrong" from "nobody will judge". Hey, if it's what you really want to do then so be it. Why do you care what other people think? However, people will judge you and they have the right to do so. Most people value ambition and working toward better things. There are good reasons for that, whether cultural or evolutionary psychology. You can do what you like as long as you aren't harming anybody, but you can't expect other people to care about the fun you are having.

The other component is informed consent. That is, do you really know the costs and risks of what you are doing? Certainly the drink and drugs are higher risk for both health/life and ending up in jail, but I'm sure you know that, even if only in the back of your mind.

There is also a significant opportunity cost. That is, if you are spending all that time just "having fun" without growing your potential (education, training, skills, intellect, etc.), it permanently reduces and delays your career path, income, promotions, seniority, retirement, retirement savings, wealth, and general options in life. In essence, you are robbing your future self by making your future life harder so that you can "have fun" now. That is, of course, in your current self's best interest, but even your current self must have some foresight that you will eventually have to live a harder life because of your current choices.

This is generally why most people will tend to judge you as a failure, because they understand that self-investment payoff and opportunity costs. People who make the choices you are making also tend to draw on taxpayer programs later as they struggle to get by, having not invested in themselves earlier in life. Perhaps you already know that, but many young people don't.

That doesn't make it a choice between having fun now or no fun. Rather, there is an optimal path of balancing fun now with investment in yourself now, such that you can have the most possible enjoyment of your life as a whole. You seem to have chosen screwing over your later life to enjoy it more now. Others choose too heavily on investing themselves and never get around to enjoying life, or not until much of their life has passed. There is an optimum balance.

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[–] 900585? ago 

I'm glad I did all of that from 19 - 24 because now I the drinking and drugs side dosent really move me.

A lot of people don't try that stuff until their mid 20's at which point it really screws them over.

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[–] Shortbutclever ago 

There's nothing wrong with that, but realize your youth is only a fraction of your whole life time. You're not gonna be able to get drunk every night, hit on pretty girls, and do drugs when you're a 60 year old man. At some point you'll have to move on from that lifestyle.

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[–] weabot ago 

No but don't expect your middle-aged and old life to not suffer (a lot) from it.

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[–] pm_me_ur_bewbs ago 

You can, but you'll hit a point in your life where you'll realize that it was only great occasionally. At that point, you'll want to do other great things and realize that a lot of opportunities are no longer there.

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[–] unlawful_smelling ago 

As long as you are accomplishing other goals. I don't see anything wrong with it.

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[–] RedSocks157 ago  (edited ago)

No, it's not. But expecting all the things you've done in the past to just vanish is wrong. There will be consequences for your actions. Basically, there's nothing wrong with it but don't go crying to the world when people judge you for it, or you don't get the job you want, or you don't have enough money to afford a new house or whatever else.

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[–] JackWhite ago 

I'm sure you feel that way now and it seems like the party will never end. But what happens when you turn 40? Do you want to be that old creepy guy at the party? Do you want to still be working your dead end job and living with roommates in a shitty apartment? I would love to get high all day and work an easier job, but I know that there are things I want out of life and the only way to get there eventually is to busy my ass. Maybe you don't want a house or kids someday, but you should at least give your future self the option by getting some of the work done now.

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