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[–] Lurkerontheroof ago  (edited ago)

1:

"if you'd shut the fuck up about your kid's junk we could all get the hell out of here..."

I read this in this guy's voice.

2:

I <3 you!

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[–] sweatingbullets ago 

The person you describe is a spot on resemblance to one of my co-workers. I'm a psych nurse, she just finished her NP program. she's mid 40's, disgustingly fucking fat, like, a good 350-380 at 5 feet. nasty, matted hair. seriously, matted like an animal. a brush has never touched that hair, not sure her arms could reach anyway. one night a nurse called out and we were looking for someone to stay, she said "oh, no. I have a hair appointment". I couldn't help myself so I blurted out "where, fucking petco". I really don't give a fuck, I'm a male nurse so I tend to get away with a lot of shit I say. she was the only person in the room who didn't damn near piss themselves. She is loud, grating and obnoxious. she smells. she always wears the same nasty fucking corduroys, so when her inner thighs rub together when she walks, well, actually her inner legs rub together, from her fupa down to her fat fucking ankles, it sounds like a death rattle. One day she was telling us how she and her fat boyfriend do naked yoga in their back yard. I gagged. yoga. yeah right, must look more like to walruses trying to outmaneuver each-other for the last greasy fish. she no longer talks to me cause she overheard a few of us commenting on how fucked up it is to have mobidly obease people in healthcare. seriously, how the fuck is a patient supposed to take them seriously when getting education on healthy lifestyle habits and such. anyway, thanks for the post, I got a chuckle. By the way, you chose a noble profession, good on you.

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[–] PeachCaj ago 

I scared my cats from laughing so hard. Take your upvoat!!

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[–] ShitlordChaser ago 

Mid Atlantic Appalachian region here. Tons and tons (lol) of fat nurses. I hope she doesn’t end up at my hospital’s network but it’s so big, if the area is right I imagine she will.

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[–] Canadian_trap_qt 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

Dough elementals is my personal favorite