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[–] Siacca 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

It just wanted to be able to say that it went to the gym. Wedging itself into spandex took all it's energy, so it had to take a nap before taking a selfie.

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[–] itsallajoke ago 

This post and the responses are serious fucking gold y'all. Thanks for the brilliance, but more importantly thanks be to the half-dead specimen that presented itself to you.

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[–] Shieldmaden [S] ago 

Can’t tell if sarcastic.

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[–] itsallajoke 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

I was sitting by myself in a public place laughing too damn much so no, not sarcastic. Thoroughly enjoyed.

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[–] Mass_Eject ago 

You have to keep that fat compressed or it will slosh over the edge and you'll end up on the floor.

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[–] Shieldmaden [S] 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

You mean like a slinky?

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[–] Mass_Eject ago 

Or a precariously balanced Jello mold.