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[–] 11386798? 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

An Australian ventriloquist visiting New Zealand walks into a small town and sees a local sitting on his porch patting his dog. He figures he'll have a little fun.

Ventriloquist: "G'day Mate! Good looking dog, mate. Mind if I speak to him?"

New Zealander: "The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Aussie."

Ventriloquist: "Hey dog, how's it going old mate?"

Dog: "Doin' alright."

New Zealander: (extreme look of shock)

Ventriloquist: "Is this Kiwi your owner?", pointing at New Zealander

Dog: "Yep"

Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"

Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food, and takes me to the lake once a week to play."

New Zealander: (look of disbelief)

Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"

New Zealander: "Uh, the horse doesn't talk either...I think."

Ventriloquist: "Hey horse, how's it going?"

Horse: "Cool."

New Zealander: (extreme look of shock)

Ventriloquist: "Is this your owner?" (pointing at New Zealander)

Horse: "Yep"

Ventriloquist: "How's he treat you?"

Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often, and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements."

New Zealander: (total look of amazement)

Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?"

New Zealander: "The sheep's a liar.

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[–] 11386789? 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

Q. Why do birds fly upside down in New Zealand?

A. Because there is nothing worth shitting on.

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[–] 11386785? 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

New Zealand: where the men are men and the sheep are worried.

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[–] 11386584? 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago  (edited ago)

That's about the closest you've been to smart isn't it?

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[–] 11386746? [S] ago 

Do you think University makes people smart?

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[–] 11386752? ago 

it was a lighthearted joke. Stop trying to being all serious about it.

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[–] 11384921? [S] 1 point -1 points (+0|-1) ago 

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[–] 11384828? ago 

Business opportunity - the all-in-one graduation burka!

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[–] 11384815? ago 

https://archive.fo/RVn8n :

Spotted at Graduation: December 2017 | Facebook

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