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[–] PhilaFerret ago 

I honestly thought you were going to suggest stealing Christmas ornaments from friends' and family's trees.

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[–] TheBuddha [S] 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

Nah, I'm only 1/8 black.

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[–] MaunaLoona 0 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago 

George Phillips of Meridian Mississippi was going up to bed when his wife told him that he’d left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window. George opened the back door to go turn off the light but saw that there were people in the shed stealing things.

He phoned the police, who asked “Is someone in your house?” and he said no. Then they said that all patrols were busy, and that he should simply lock his door and an officer would be along when available.

George said “Okay,” hung up, counted to 30, and phoned the police again. “Hello. I just called you a few seconds ago because there were people in my shed. Well, you don’t have to worry about them now cause I’ve just shot them all.” Then he hung up.

Within five minutes three police cars, an Armed Response unit, and an ambulance showed up at the Phillips residence. Of course, the police caught the burglars red-handed. One of the policemen said to George: “I thought you said that you’d shot them!”

George said, “I thought you said there was nobody available!”

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[–] LinoleumFulcrum 0 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago 

Great plan! It's like asking for advice online...

You don't ask, you tell everyone the (in)correct way to do it and you'll have people staying up all night to refute you and deliver you with the correct methodology.

Thanks for doing the work for me, internet!

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[–] InDifferent 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

Definitely works for any Linux related question. Just say how much easier it is to do what you want in Windows and you'll get 20 different ways to do it.

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[–] Treefart 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

Yeah that's not actually how you do research on the internet, I've been up all night researching the correct ways so I'll let you know how to do it now.....

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[–] Pawn 1 point 1 point (+2|-1) ago 

actually you are supposed to call them a nigger, before proclaiming you solved the problem.