[–] MyDrunkAccount 1 point 9 points 10 points (+10|-1) ago
First job Johnson? No problem, just go sprinkle some bullet casings around the body, turn down your phone's resolution to "potato", and take a picture. Standard procedures, nothing funny. Make sure to get the suicide handgun in the shot. Pro tip Johnson, they're easier to get in frame than the rifle he's about to use. Haha! Get it Johnson? Haha! "About to use"...because we're framing him...you're not laughing Johnson..."
Later
Goddamn it Johnson! Who sprinkles casings on top of a headshot pool of blood?! I swear to god we need to start hiring based on merit again.
[–] lemetion_def 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
Wait I just noticed that. WTF
[–] MyDrunkAccount ago
Regular people like you and me will never know what actually happened. We can only know what didn't happen by listening to the news.
[–] selpai 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago (edited ago)
Somehow, this is more believable than a lone man, with no history gun-interest, finding access to fully automatic weapons, and shooting thousands of bullets. Not every bullet could have hit, and the injured+killed are reported to be in the 600's right? Was there supposed to be a Gatling gun up in that room? I don't get it.
Also, how and why was this photo leaked? This almost never happens, except where the agency involved has something to prove.
[–] ucantdothatontv 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
BEST!!!!