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[–] Kvoat 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

Never really wanted to have kids but always thought I might change my mind when I "grow up". I'm 25 now and I dont feel like I've grown up one bit, and I cant see it happening anytime soon. I have two step brothers that are both younger than me that have 6 kids between them and over the past few years just seeing what they are going through has been enough to solidify my position for life as far as I'm concerned.

[–] [deleted] 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago  (edited ago)

[Deleted]

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[–] babybleu 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

Sorry, dude. That sucks, did he ever kick her to the curb?

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[–] chipskylark 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

The idea that I didn't NEED to have kids struck me around the age of 15/16. That's when I started to think, well, maybe this isn't for me. At 19 I started to travel and that only confirmed it for me. Now, at 22, I have the cutest kid to babysit and that has been the biggest confirmation for me so far. I like kids, I love working with them, but hell no I'm never going to be a mom. I'd be a shit mom. It's not for me. It doesn't suit my personality and life goals.

[–] [deleted] 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

[Deleted]

[–] [deleted] ago 

[Deleted]

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[–] Tex_Mex_Hex 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

When I was in my early twenties or so... I ended up making it something that permanently will never happen (children) from me, so when people say I'll change my mind now, I just smile like a shark and nod along.

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[–] LizardBreathe 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

I am in my 30s and have been CF since high school. People will continue to tell you that you will change your mind until you have aged more.

The last time someone told me that I would change my mind, I laughed at them and told them I would have to do a lot of work in a short period of time, since I am not married (dating another CF person), so I would have to dump my boyfriend, find a new one, convince him to marry me, get married, and then get pregnant... no happening.

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[–] Supreme_Authority 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

Long before 24.

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[–] grimnir 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

I have an 8yo. I never wanted to have a kid. I told myself for years that the consideration for having a kid would wait until I was in my late 20's and could properly care for it, I told significant others this as well. I'm 30 now, when I was 22 I still didn't want to have a kid, but I really wanted to have a fulfilling relationship, and unfortunately she wanted a kid. I was poor, had no good plan for getting out of it, but I worked hard and could make enough money to survive, as I had been doing since leaving school. I definitely should not have had a kid, not with her, not simply because she wanted something to validate a relationship. I still don't want a kid now, even an 8yo who loves me very much, that I care about. If I could have those 8 years of my life back I would take them immediately.

Reality however is that I'm separated, re-married to someone who is childfree and wants to remain that way, and on bad terms with her to the point I'm not sure I'll see my kid again unless I get a lawyer. My parents don't like this turn of events, and turned their back on me to keep her on good terms so they can see my kid. The expected thing to do in this situation is to get a lawyer, fight for my parental rights, establish dominance, pee on things to claim my territory, and other tedious and money-consuming things that I honestly don't care about. This makes me a bad person, and my parents make sure to remind me that I'm a bad person.

I was childfree once, I knew having kids was not something I would embrace and I made the mistake of doing it anyway. Your biological functions can wait 10-15 years, if you're not sure, keep waiting. Enjoy being childfree until you're sure you've finished your life and want to sacrifice the rest of it to a spawn of your own.

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[–] babybleu 1 point 0 points (+1|-1) ago 

Upvoat for the honesty.

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