[–] [deleted] 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
[–] Scruffy_Nerfherder [S] ago
LOL, there is enough dread to go round right now. I read a bit about that and that might have been the ticket, to actually work out and get in shape. That might be my plan to reassert myself, just be a better me. I got a ways to go.
[–] BoraxTheFungarian 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
You are to take care of you wife. If you're not doing that, she gonna be defiant. If you can't think of yourselves together as an unstoppable revel force, you need to rethink your dynamic. Did she get on the SJW train or what? My approach would be to say, "What the fuck am I doing so wrong that you won't listen to me?" If you get an answer, listen VERY carefully. Then act like you have a solution.
[–] Scruffy_Nerfherder [S] ago
Starting out I was in every conceivable way. That wasn't doing it. It is a protracted problem.
[–] WhiteRonin 0 points 3 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago
@le_squish asked all the questions so it's hard to make any comment without background.
All I can think k of is you did something(s) or didn't do something(s) and she lost respect for you and felt she had to take charge. Humans and dogs have a pack mentality, if your dog is out of control or the opposite it's so scared of you and obeys -- you are doing it wrong.
I'm gonna venture out that you need marriage counseling, a good lawyer or find some very good alcohol. But before jumping the gun, have a sit down chat and lay it out how you feel when she ignores you and ask her why she feels the need to do it. If you feel an argument is gonna hapoen, tell her thanks for her time and walk out of the room. If she berates you tell her you didn't want to anger her or start a fight and that you aren't gonna participate in one. Let her cool down and try to address what just happened. If rinse and repeat keeps occuring g without progress, the first 3 options now apply.
I'm on my second marriage and have never been happier in my life. But that is because I learned what a pack leader is the hard way.
[–] Scruffy_Nerfherder [S] 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
I finally got a chance to reply without her standing over me. LOL, it's not like she snoops or anything but it's a little hard to write stuff down about a person that is sitting right next to you.
[–] PM_ME_YOUR_BOOBS2 0 points 3 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago
Serious answer, be patient. If you are to be the leader then you have to be wise and patient. Forgiveness and patients are the signs of a good leader. Be firm when you must but forgive. You are the head of your house but that means giving up what you want for what is best for your family. A good leader inspires a poor leader lords over. Good luck and remember you are a man, which means you remain patient and controlled above all else.
[–] Scruffy_Nerfherder [S] 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
I posted another more detailed message on another comment, but the short answer is everything. To the point that she would ask my opinion about something a or b, and if I said a, she would choose b. Every time. We have gotten that straightened out and now she only asks my opinion if she is really looking for it and we reason through choices better, but it started out as not listening to me about anything and only got worse from there - if such a thing were possible.
[–] [deleted] 0 points 5 points 5 points (+5|-0) ago (edited ago)
[–] Scruffy_Nerfherder [S] ago
We are finally at the point we can talk about it, I have a way to go before I can take the wheel again. This shit broke me, now she has the reigns. I think that when I get better there will be a little more understanding.