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[–] HitlerDinduNufin 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

If I lived in the USA, I would set something like this up, but with a weight scale near the candy bowl that set off an air horn, strobe light and some kind of pop up zombie or something if a beetus golem tried to get near the bowl. (or just a video stream with remote activation).

Watching fats try to escape danger is just about the most amusing thing on earth to me.

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[–] WonderfulTriggers 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

Just trying to beat Starvashun Mode.

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[–] hiddencounter 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

I'd love to see someone just hide and leave the bowl of candy out.

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[–] GuyLeDouche 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

Jesus christ, I would hate to live somewhere where anyone could just walk up to my front door (or waddle up, in this case). What a bunch of fucking cunts, though I guess it's par for the course with these beasts. Remember, they only eat 1200 calories a day!

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[–] MoltenFat 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

Damn, that's how farmers must feel when they see a pack of wild boars hogging out on their crops!

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[–] dogheads 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

It's a shame there isn't some poison that has no ill effects at a small dose but is lethal in large doses. Poison all your candies, and only the fatties that take too many will end up dying.

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[–] llwish 0 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago 

There is... it's called sugar and it's gonna catch up with them soon.

You'd think they would have skipped the exercise and just went and bought the stuff.

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[–] mmmmdonuts ago  (edited ago)

Fats are way too selfish for that. They'll take ANYTHING they can get their hands on, even if they have to exert themselves for two seconds.

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[–] Jewy_McJewFace 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

OP should have built that porch with posts every 18" to prevent the fats.

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[–] Rawscent 0 points 2 points (+2|-0) ago 

Fats fatting. We know they pig like this, that's why everyone hates them. Just need to save this when they reeee about discrimination.

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